Trendy Funny Quotes

  • If my trainee says “oh God” one more time, he’s going to meet him.
  • ‘I have a ripe avocado at home’ is my favorite excuse for cancelling plans.
  • Never trust someone who can eat 24/7 but is still skinny.
  • I hate when I go to the kitchen looking for food, and all I find is ingredients.
  • All these laws are really getting in the way of my driving.
  • I have a huge to-do list, I just have to figure out who’s gonna do it.