Whenever I see an athlete eating quark, I get sad, because the quark could have been turned into cheesecake.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

Lie about the gap in your resume. Tell them you had to help some Hobbits take a ring to Mordor or something.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this makes no sense, microwave.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

I’m sorry I lied to you. I only did it for material gain. And to cause you psychological harm. And to prove I’m smarter than you.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

I dreamt this night that I had died and when I woke up, a piece of me was actually already stiff.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

Blowing over it is also dusting.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

Hobosexual. A person who dates you with the sole interest of having a place to stay.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

Looking to sell my DeLorean. Great shape, low mileage. Only driven from time to time.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

My nickname in high school was “who?”

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

Sorry, can’t make it, just remembered I don’t want to.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

If I ever get the death penalty, I hope “by chocolate” is an option.