Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • That beeping of the parking assistant when you get too close to other cars. I’d like that for people.
  • Job interview: Where do you see yourself in five years? Me: Hopefully on a sabbatical.
  • There are two types of people: Those who steal food off your plate and those who you keep in your life.
  • Everyone tells me “take care”, but no one tells me why.
  • 8 planets, 204 countries, thousands of islands, 7 seas, 8 billion people, and I’m single.
  • Just had a crazy revelation: you can eat in the airport after your flight, too.