Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

If a baby comes out feet first, technically it wears its mom as a hat.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

My birth year getting a lil too far on those lil scroll lists. I don’t like that.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

I’ve heard that some people have kids who sleep through the night and I’d like to know if they use tranquilizers or chloroform.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

Explain it to me like I’m five then do it for me like I’m one hundred.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

My husband said we need to start exercising and get into shape, so I’m going to wake up early tomorrow and start looking for a new husband.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

When I trip, I always look back to see who or what did it, because it couldn’t have possibly been my fault.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

You wish you had this many chins.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

Nothing humbles you faster than your phone slipping out of your hand and hitting your face.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

On the internet it’s super easy to take credit for stuff you had nothing to do with. That’s why I invented it.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

I really love how squirrels get extra chubby heading into winter mostly because it’s super relatable.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

822 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,984

Funny Quotes Topics

13,927

Funny Quotes Images

10,984

35 minutes ago

3,420

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Reddit:

People who don’t admit their mistakes disgust me. I would absolutely admit to a mistake if I had ever made one.

Reported on Telegram:

It’s cold and dark outside, made me think of you.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Sometimes, I feel like my brain is still running on Windows 95.

Going viral on Slack:

Went to the grocery store hungry. I didn’t need to pay rent this month anyway.

Reported on Facebook:

Old people be like “no elbows on the table, it’s rude” then say something racist.

Trending via Snapchat:

You’re a “haha” girl, and I’m an “lol” guy. It just wouldn’t work.

Spotted on Instagram:

I toss and turn in bed all night like a beautiful rotisserie chicken.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I take issue with furniture that deliberately moves 1 inch when you’re in a rush to get by.

Making waves on Twitch:

Ripped a tag off my leggings and did not realize it was load-bearing.

Breaking via Twitch:

Currently into monogamous friendships. If you have other friends, please don’t talk to me, it hurts my heart.

Applying for jobs sometimes is wild, like how am I supposed to be passionate about a company I don’t even work for yet?

6 months ago

Applying for jobs sometimes is wild, like how am I supposed to be passionate about a company I don’t even work for yet?

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah, the classic Catch-22 of job applications – it's like trying to choose your favorite ice cream flavor without ever tasting them 🍦😂 But hey, who knows, maybe you'll end up falling head over heels for a company you didn't even know existed! Life's full of surprises, after all. Just keep those cover letters sincere and the interview smiles genuine – you never know what magic could happen! ✨🤝 #JobSearchChronicles

am, application, career, company, employment, even, humor, hunt, i, interview, job, job application, job hunt, jobs, passion, wild, work

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

822 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,984

Funny Quotes Topics

13,927

Funny Quotes Images

10,984

35 minutes ago

3,435

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

I deserve a treat when I have a bad week, but I also deserve a treat when I have a good week. I simply always deserve treats.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

After an hour on this team meeting I’m not wanting to be a team player anymore.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

As a student, the most comforting words you’ll ever hear are “I haven’t started either.”

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

I be skipping everyone’s stories but watch mine like 20 times.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

One thing no one mentions about being an adult is how much time you debate with yourself over keeping a cardboard box because it’s a really good box.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

Quitting my job to focus on being in love.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

Person: gives compliment. Me: let me give you a brief synopsis of why you are sorely mistaken.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

I hate when I have dreams about work. I’m not getting paid to interact with these people on my time off!

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

Me: I’ve always wanted to stare at someone from across the street then disappear when a bus passes. Interviewer: I meant more like “professional goals”.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

The invention of locks was a key turning point in history.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Instagram:

I might look calm, but in my head I’ve punched you in the face three times.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

What, and I cannot stress this enough, day is it.

Just landed via Twitch:

Welcome to your 40’s: See that kid dressed up like a cop? He is a cop.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Text a co-worker at a random time “are you joining this meeting?” as a fun holiday prank.

Making waves on Discord:

I want a man who doesn’t annoy me while I’m constantly getting on his nerves. It can’t be that difficult.

Seen just now on Slack:

Please help my husband and I decide on dinner. We’ve narrowed it down to “It doesn’t matter” and “It’s your turn to choose”.

Seen just now on X:

If your first child is uncomplicated, then it’s a trick of nature to get you to have a second child. The second will be an unpredictable bundle of energy that seems to get by without sleep.

Just shared via Pinterest:

I am a full grown adult. Now listen to me discuss the various plot holes in Paw Patrol.

Trending via WeChat:

Life is short, flirt with me!

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Sometimes I don’t have anything intelligent to say and sometimes I don’t let that stop me.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All fights retarded. 🤪

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴