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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

We are all just prisoners here of our phone device.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

You’d be surprised how many times you can use the word succulent in a work email.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

Bit strange that the same culture is responsible for both kissing and onion soup. You’d think they’d be incompatible.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

Why do my kids have Veteran’s Day off, they haven’t done shit.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

You want me to attend a work meeting? The thing that killed Julius Caesar?

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

Doing my bit for the evolution of the human race by eating lots of carbs and never exercising. We will adapt!

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

I signed up to the gym a few months ago and still don’t see any results. I’ll go by there this weekend and ask what’s going on.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

Kinda miss being a child and wondering why the moon follows me.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

I touched grass today, and I’m still like this. Please advise.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

I do all my own stunts, but never intentionally.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

237 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,506

Funny Quotes Topics

17,571

Funny Quotes Images

15,506

Jan 6, 2026

3,242

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on LinkedIn:

“Comparison is the thief of joy!” Well, not if you’re better than everyone else.

Going viral on Messenger:

My future husband is very lucky; he will never stay hungry, because I know so many restaurants with delicious food.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Nothing is more fake than my friendliness on the phone at work.

Just landed via WeChat:

Having your own apartment by yourself is so funny, cause I really just swept the whole place naked.

Shared recently on Discord:

Getting to the age where I’m like, “Oh, hopefully I’ll be dead by then.”

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Everything is 10 times funnier when you are supposed to be quiet.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I need a break from me.

Making waves on Instagram:

Finding a person to make eye contact with during stupid meetings is essential to survival in the workplace.

Going viral on Slack:

Ugh, but profoundly.

Just shared via Facebook:

Whenever I go down the stairs next to an escalator, I always move faster than the escalator to prove to the people I made the better decision.

Applying for jobs sometimes is wild, like how am I supposed to be passionate about a company I don’t even work for yet?

2 months ago

0

Applying for jobs sometimes is wild, like how am I supposed to be passionate about a company I don’t even work for yet?

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah, the classic Catch-22 of job applications – it's like trying to choose your favorite ice cream flavor without ever tasting them 🍦😂 But hey, who knows, maybe you'll end up falling head over heels for a company you didn't even know existed! Life's full of surprises, after all. Just keep those cover letters sincere and the interview smiles genuine – you never know what magic could happen! ✨🤝 #JobSearchChronicles

am, application, career, company, employment, even, humor, hunt, i, interview, job, job application, job hunt, jobs, passion, wild, work

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I love being a pretty woman because it widens the threshold for cringe-worthy things I can say.

0

2 months ago

being, confidence, cringe, humor, humor quote, i, love, pretty, say, self-awareness, self-deprecating, things, threshold, vanity, woman, women
Wondering when these skinny jeans are gonna kick in.

0

2 months ago

body, body image, expectation, fashion, humor, image, jean, jeans, kick, skinny, skinny jean, skinny jeans, style
Back to work after the long holiday weekend, so you’re finally away from the relatives you don’t like, and back with the co-workers you don’t like.

0

2 months ago

after, away, back, back to work, co-workers, coworkers, family, holiday, humor, office, relatif, sarcasm, weekend, work
I told a joke during a Zoom meeting today. Nobody laughed. It turns out I’m not even remotely funny.

0

2 months ago

attempt, awkwardness, comedy, even, failure, Funny, humor, humor attempt, i, joke, joke failure, meeting, nobody, online, online meeting, social, social awkwardness, today, told, workplace, Zoom, Zoom meeting
I always figure it out on my own, I just need to panic first.

0

1 month ago

always, anxiety, figure, humor, i, just, need, own, panic, problem, problem-solving, self-reliance, solving, stress
If you wanna make someone cry, just show them the earliest year they can retire.

0

2 months ago

check, cry, goal, humor, just, life, life goal, reality, reality check, retirement, sad, sad truth, show, someone, truth, year

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

50 shares on TikTok this month:

A pie where there isn’t pastry on the bottom isn’t a pie. It’s soup with a hat.

54 shares on YouTube this month:

If we start dating now, we could be arguing on a road trip by August.

60 shares on Telegram this month:

Remember, for some unknown reason Santa doesn’t make batteries.

73 shares on Messenger this month:

When you have finished reading this funny quote, you will be a little closer to death than before.

56 shares on X this month:

Waiting for toast to toast takes forever unless you walk away for 10 seconds, then it burns.

85 shares on Reddit this month:

Pilots lowkey have an aura when they walk past you in the airport.

88 shares on Threads this month:

I remember when “disinformation” used to be called “lies.”

62 shares on Telegram this month:

Just seen a guy with a Coca-Cola and yellow Lay’s chips. Classic combo, he knows his stuff.

71 shares on Messenger this month:

Now hush, Lil Labubu, don’t you cry, everything’s gonna be Dubai.

90 shares on Facebook this month:

It’s so cool when people who write for a living admit that they don’t read books or have thoughts.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Remember, you don’t have to worry about being around annoying people in public if you never leave the house.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

My shadow quit because I’m too boring.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

When I’m behind a slow car, I steer my car a little to the right so the people behind me can see that it isn’t my fault.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

The Angry Birds assaulted me and made me rip their disgusting bong.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not saying I’m old, but when I was in school, we made our parents ashtrays for Christmas.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

My wife asked me why the bottle of wine we bought yesterday was half empty. I said because she is a pessimist.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

When my wife packs for a trip she basically moves out.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

My superpower is holding onto stuff for years and throwing it away exactly one week before I need it.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Maybe if we paid our streaming services even more, they could stop jacking up the volume on the commercials they make us watch, even though we are paying for the service.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Girls Just Want To Have Naan

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

237 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,506

Funny Quotes Topics

17,571

Funny Quotes Images

15,506

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,333

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

Missionary, so we can discuss how 15 min can save us 15% or more on car insurance.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

Milking stools only have three legs, because the cow has the udder.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

Nothing ruins an introvert’s day like a 4 p.m. appointment.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

Salary week, but salary weak.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

Who develops the algorithm? I want to speak to the manager.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

I see you liked my selfie, but what about my ideas?

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

Everyone’s gangsta until grandma grabs that wooden spoon.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

Called in, “I can either stay home today and learn to play this accordion or bring it in with me. Your call.”

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

I have high standards for dating because I’m a high-quality woman, and you wouldn’t want me any other way.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

The masculine urge to make a woman sit through a YouTube video that she will not find funny or entertaining.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WhatsApp:

Don’t buy me flowers. A bouquet of KitKats will suffice.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I withdraw my argument. I didn’t realize you had a meme to back you up.

Breaking via Snapchat:

My favorite emails are the ones that say your order has shipped.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Are you coming to the party? There will be noise and lights but I found a corner for us to hide.

Breaking via TikTok:

I’m either at work, going to work, coming home from work, getting ready for work, getting some sleep for work, or thinking about not wanting to go to work.

Just shared via Telegram:

Only 6 hours, 45 minutes and 35 years until I’m done with work.

Making waves on TikTok:

Bruce Lee had a faster older brother named Sudden Lee.

Going bananas on Messenger:

Fish must think we look so weird with both eyes on the front of our face.

Spotted on Discord:

I was having a great day, and then, people.

Trending via X:

Once I find a dragon, y’all are toast.

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