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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

Autumn and winter are coming. The time when I make myself tea and always forget that I’ve made myself tea.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

I watched a woman clean her whole house on YouTube today, in case you thought I lacked ambition.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

If I say goodnight and an hour later you see me online, it’s not that I lied; it’s just that I failed.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

My Saturday was going really well, until I realized it’s Sunday!

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

Stay an extra hour in the office and no one cares. Arrive a few minutes late and everyone loses their minds.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

Feeling lonely? Just glue a coffee cup to the roof of your car. Everyone will wave to you.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

Ruining the Olympics for my fiancée by, every time they mention Paris, saying, “that’s where Ratatouille lived”.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

People who are on Twitter and put intelligent in their bio, good one.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

I love ketchup from my head to-ma-toes.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has bookmarked:

I heard you like bad boys. Well, I’m bad. At everything.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

787 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,949

Funny Quotes Topics

13,921

Funny Quotes Images

10,949

29 minutes ago

3,426

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Discord:

That little stroll to the coffee maker makes me happy every morning.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Naked and Afraid because there’s a spider in the shower with me.

Going viral on Reddit:

I dropped and broke my phone today. Hurt more than childbirth!

Spotted on Slack:

Stomach: I will now demonstrate a blue whale’s mating call.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Anytime a guy says “that’s what she said” always reply with “yeah, but not to you”.

Shared recently on Telegram:

All my small talk is done with a car horn.

Seen just now on Reddit:

In a job interview, you can always respond to an awkward question with a deep gaze and parted lips, followed by “You complete me.”

Making waves on YouTube:

I think if you ask Kanye for a million at the right time, he’ll give it to you.

Trending via Discord:

A good rule to remember for life is that when it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain.

Spotted on Facebook:

I pretend I don’t care about stuff, but that’s only because I have no idea what’s going on around me at any given time.

Before social media, you could just completely forget that somebody existed. Good times.

6 months ago

Before social media, you could just completely forget that somebody existed. Good times.

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Commentary:
Ah, the golden days when ignoring someone meant they practically vanished into thin air! 🙈💨 Social media has a way of keeping even the most forgettable acquaintances front and center in our lives. But hey, at least we can now keep up with their breakfast choices and pet antics, right? 🍳🐾 #GoodTimes, indeed!

before, communication, existed, forget, good, good times, just, media, nostalgia, relationships, social, social media, somebody, times

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

787 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,949

Funny Quotes Topics

13,921

Funny Quotes Images

10,949

29 minutes ago

3,442

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

Life hack: if you run out of treadmill space for your clothes, get a piano.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

So apparently if they ask “do you trust me?”, replying with “well, I trust you to be you” is the incorrect response.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

Relationship status: my last pickpocket had really gentle hands.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Sorry, I don’t think I can hang out this weekend, my 4-year-old is still telling a joke.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

You look like the kind of person who would hit rock bottom and then start drilling.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

Foot fetish should just be called feetish.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

Not to brag, but I don’t need alcohol to send texts I’ll regret.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

My tattoo means that I can’t be trusted with $200.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

I no longer need an alarm clock because I’m over 40 and have a bladder.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

I sent you a message telepathically and you didn’t respond. Are you mad at me?

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Instagram:

I hope none of the people I vowed to “help hide a body” ever actually need my help.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I just need a little time to warm up to you, and then I’ll be super fun, I promise—1-2 years at most.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I have absolutely no desire to stay in the loop.

Trending via Threads:

Once I get my UFO, don’t be asking me for rides.

Trending via Slack:

People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I set up my Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, Mary, Joseph and all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.

Just shared via Reddit:

If I’m ever found dead in the woods, it’s probably because I was trying to pet a bear.

Shared recently on Messenger:

They should combine the running of the bulls with Tour de France next year.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Strangers vomiting their beliefs all over you every day is not good for the soul.

Just landed via Instagram:

You’ll never be as lazy as the person who named the fireplace.

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