Wordgag ใƒ„

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡พ๐Ÿ‡ช has copied:

My mind is like someone dumped the entire junk drawer on a trampoline.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ป has bookmarked:

If we start dating now, we could be arguing on a road trip by August.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ณ has downloaded:

Remember when the most annoying thing about Twitter was trying to think of a shorter word.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ท has shared:

Donโ€™t be boring. Create the gossip you would like to hear.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ท has bookmarked:

Google Maps should start screaming the more wrong turns you make.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has viewed:

My chakra went out for cigarettes.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ฎ has copied:

Has anyone seen my invisibility cloak?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ช๐Ÿ‡ช has shared:

Introverts donโ€™t recharge with sleep, we recharge by being left completely alone for 3โ€“5 business days.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ has shared:

Nothing angers me more than tall ghosts in horror movies. No one born in 1782 was that tall. Do your research, screenwriters.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ต has copied:

I donโ€™t understand people who forget to eat. Iโ€™m already planning lunch while chewing breakfast.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,500

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Freshly posted on Threads:

I think I’m closer to retirement than to a relationship.

Just landed via Facebook:

Is it healthier to drink tap water and let the fluoride calcify my pineal gland or drink bottled spring water and let micro plastics settle in my balls?

Shared recently on Messenger:

I just paid my taxes. The roads should be fixed any day now.

Making waves on Threads:

Giving out false information so I know who the leak is.

Just shared via Instagram:

People who pee in the shower, have you thought about peeing before you get in the shower?

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Letting my wife sleep in a little longer for Motherโ€™s Day before we wake her up and ask whatโ€™s for breakfast.

Making waves on WeChat:

Itโ€™s never too early to be sad about having to work the next day.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

The worst part about getting sucked up by the tornado you’re filming is to die knowing your wife was right. You are an idiot.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I can’t be the only person who thinks the presidential debate should be performed as a rap battle.

Going viral on Instagram:

Seeking a date so intense even the candles are sweating.

Dating apps never work for me because I need at least two years of friendship charged with weird sexual tension to even consider falling in love.

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Commentary:
"Looks like this person is on the slow-burn romance program! ๐Ÿข๐Ÿ˜‚ Who needs dating apps when you've got a two-year long odyssey of awkward glances and accidental touches to look forward to? ๐Ÿ™ˆ๐Ÿ’˜ #TakingItSlowAndSteady"

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Trending Funny Quotes ๐Ÿ‘‡

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Social Media Stars โญ

81 shares on Facebook this month:

I don’t want to brag but I walked into a room and remembered why I walked in.

59 shares on Reddit this month:

Hey man, just wanted to reach out and say I loved how much you drank at my wedding last night.

11 shares on Slack this month:

Everyone loves a little silent treatment on the weekend.

53 shares on Pinterest this month:

You ever have one of those days that require the use of both of your middle fingers?

80 shares on WeChat this month:

Not really interested in anything that isnโ€™t everything.

70 shares on WeChat this month:

I’ve done literally nothing all day, except feel guilty about doing nothing all day.

93 shares on Facebook this month:

Unsolicited sandwich pics.

86 shares on Slack this month:

I realized Americans were dramatics the day I found out 200 lb is just 90 kg.

20 shares on YouTube this month:

Iโ€™m shocked it offended you, I was certain someone was gonna need to explain it to you.

16 shares on Slack this month:

Cheesecake dislikers are attention seekers.

Trending Topics ๐Ÿ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes ๐Ÿ’ฅ

24 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

When I learned the word “literally,” that was the beginning of the end.

11 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

If at first you donโ€™t succeed, thatโ€™s so embarrassing. Why are you so bad at this?

14 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

My new pajamas have no pockets. I donโ€™t want to hear your problems.

24 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

For my next trick, I’ll watch a two-hour movie in four.

18 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

A fabric tomato filled with needles. Donโ€™t see that much anymore.

20 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

The world contains protons, neutrons, electrons, and morons.

19 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

I had an irrational fear of bees until I saw My Girl and it became rational.

22 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Getting ghosted by someone who bothered you in the first place is crazy.

11 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

I don’t understand how some people find love several times in their lives. I first have to find someone who doesn’t get on my nerves.

8 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

If elves make shoes, cookies, and toys, why donโ€™t we put them in charge of more stuff?

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

calculatingโ€ฆ

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,355

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ณ has bookmarked:

We should be able to call in healthy: “I feel amazing today, and I’m not wasting it at work.”

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ท has copied:

Super excited about a brand new week of self-sabotage.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has downloaded:

A wise man once said: “Yes, darling. You’re right.”

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡บ has downloaded:

I’m afraid that AI will quickly realize that the biggest problem on Earth is humans – and then solve the problem.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has shared:

With great power comes the absolute certainty that you’ll turn into a right douche.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has downloaded:

I want the job where I push scared skydivers out of planes.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has shared:

I do not support all women. Some of you are very mean for no reason.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ฑ has viewed:

In Star Wars, anyone can hop in any spaceship and knows how to fly it. I just spent 20 minutes trying to find the headlights in a rental car.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ป has viewed:

I hate that I’m so indecisive. Actually, I don’t know if hate is the right word.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ณ has bookmarked:

There is a grave concern that this post will produce zero likes.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

I think, therefore I am. I am, therefore I think. Therefore I am. I think.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Everyone is posting their vacation pictures and I’m likeโ€ฆ I went shopping.

Spotted on Twitch:

Every time I see a couple riding a tandem bike, I try to figure out which one of them is pissed about it.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Withholding sex from you people isnโ€™t working.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I haven’t been with anyone in 3 years. I feel sorry for my next boyfriend. He might not make it through the day.

Freshly posted on Discord:

The first thing you need to know about social media is that everyoneโ€™s on vacation, except for you.

Trending via Reddit:

Yesterday my husband thought he saw a cockroach in the kitchen. He sprayed and cleaned everything thoroughly. Today I’m putting the cockroach in the bathroom.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Just told my kids it’s illegal to have the light on while we’re driving. I will not break this cycle.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

If you only watched reality TV dating shows, you would probably estimate the number of people who work in medical device sales in the United States to be approximately 80,000,000.

Just shared via Reddit:

Ex’s be like “I gave you everything”. Yeah, trust issues.

ยฉ 2026. All rights reserved.

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