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Commentary:
"Who knew elevator rides could be such an epic saga in the movies? 🎥😄 You're just waiting to get to the next floor, not fighting off aliens and having heartfelt confessions! 🤣👽 #MovieMagic"

30, comparison, elevator, expectation, humor, life, minutes, movy, real, real life, reality, ride, time

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The main reason for stress is the daily contact with idiots.

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2 months ago

contact, daily, idiot, idiots, main, reason, stress
Do you also watch porn until the end to see if they end up getting married?

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2 months ago

date, end, getting, humor, marriage, married, porn, relationship, watch
Yes, I do talk to myself, everyone else just wants to argue with me.

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2 months ago

argue, conversation, else, everyone, humor, i, introspection, just, me, myself, sarcasm, self, talk, wants, wit, yes
I wish I was as tired in bed at night as I am after lunch at work.

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2 months ago

am, bed, fatigue, humor, i, irony, lunch, night, rest, tired, wish, work
A little mischievousness is good for the soul.

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5 months ago

fun, good, humor, little, mischievousness, personality, playful, soul
“It’s swimsuit season” I say, eating another swimsuit.

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2 months ago

another, body, body image, diet, eating, humor, i, image, irony, say, season, summer, swimsuit

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

81 shares on Twitch this month:

That song stuck in my head is “Don’t Speak”; I have no doubt in my mind.

52 shares on Facebook this month:

It is very hard to set aside the time to do your taxes when you are really busy doing other things like eating a snack or looking around the room.

51 shares on Twitch this month:

Sorry for acting weird, I am weird, and it will happen again.

77 shares on YouTube this month:

Maybe Baby wants to be put in the corner.

53 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t follow washing instructions, you’re my clothes you don’t tell me what to do.

44 shares on Telegram this month:

What happened to the art of just liking one person?

22 shares on Slack this month:

My yoga instructor was drunk today. Put me in a very awkward position.

63 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’m glad it’s not snowing. I can’t imagine shoveling snow in this heat.

85 shares on Telegram this month:

Dating me is super easy. I text you at 8; you reply at 8:00:01.

77 shares on Slack this month:

Dating apps aren’t working. I’ll see ya at Home Depot, gentlemen.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

Monday holds the record for being the worst day of the week.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

How are they running out of oxygen if they’re breathing it right back into the submarine?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

I want a man who doesn’t annoy me while I’m constantly getting on his nerves. It can’t be that difficult.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

Met a microbiologist once. They’re a lot bigger than I imagined.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

Picking up a hitchhiker is not worth the risk of being forced to make small talk with a stranger.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

Dogs come when they’re called; cats take a message and get back to you later.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

Harry Potter is sort of crazy. I would have never fought a war for my high school.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

Gang members are so lucky to have something to do with their hands in photos.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

It takes so much energy to go inside a Walmart.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

“Ooh, you’ve caught the sun.” Translation: You look like you’ve been swimming in a volcano.

Going viral on Telegram:

The ugliest version of me is the version that comes out when I play board games. I don’t know who she is, but she is a monster. She is not fit for human interaction.

Breaking via Instagram:

The bowling ball actually hangs out with the pins after work. There isn’t beef there.

Shared recently on X:

Imagine trying to ruin my day and I ignore you for the rest of my life.

Freshly posted on X:

Started from the bottom and I’m still ain’t shit.

Going viral on Twitch:

Unless I ask, I genuinely don’t care to hear other people’s opinions on my life. It’s almost a pet peeve, really.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Being bilingual means stuttering in both languages.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

“I didn’t vote for this.” — people who absolutely voted for this but thought this would only hurt people they hate.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Someone told me I wasn’t thinking clearly, as if that’s even an option.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

I can keep my mouth shut, but you can read the subtitles on my face.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Elevator rides in real life: 30 seconds long. Elevator rides in movies: Two minutes long.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

The main reason for stress is the daily contact with idiots.

Do you also watch porn until the end to see if they end up getting married?

Yes, I do talk to myself, everyone else just wants to argue with me.

I wish I was as tired in bed at night as I am after lunch at work.

A little mischievousness is good for the soul.

“It’s swimsuit season” I say, eating another swimsuit.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨