Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Found a picture of me sitting on Santa’s lap. Hard to believe it’s been a whole year.
  • If my neighbors would just talk a little louder I could follow along with their conversation, but no. Rude.
  • When my cat gets in trouble I call him by his full name, Catthew.
  • The one thing I think most parents need to realize is, there’s absolutely no secrets that your child doesn’t share about you in the classroom.
  • It is a shame that nothing is built in America anymore. I just bought a TV that said: “Built in Antenna”. I don’t even know where that is.
  • Like many men my age, my biggest regret is hiring the inexpensive hitman.