Commentary:
When in doubt, at least my inner compass keeps me spinning in style! 🧭🔄😄
43 Funny follow quotes
It’s important to follow your significant other around the grocery store, not helping, and only hovering like the specter of death.
Commentary:
When you’re the grocery store's equivalent of a haunted shopping cart 🛒👻 just floating through the aisles waiting for snack approval! 🍫🍿
If I was a stray cat, I’d follow you home and let you domesticate me.
Commentary:
Be honest, you’d have me microchipped and spoiled with treats in no time 😸🛋️
Best thing about TikTok is you literally don’t need to follow anyone to have a good time.
Commentary:
Who needs friends when you have a for you page that knows your deepest, darkest memes? 😂📱
When animals lead you to a place, it’s so cute… like, yes, I’m still following. Thank you for constantly turning around to make sure.
Commentary:
Following a squirrel tour guide like it's leading a wildlife vacation: "Next on our tour, the majestic trash can!" 😂🐿️🗺️
Follow your heart, but take your brain with you.
Commentary:
When your brain insists on being your heart's chaperone 😄🧠❤️
“Follow your heart,” as advice, is sort of like “abandon yourself to cognitive bias.”
Commentary:
"Taking advice from my heart is like getting directions from a GPS with a crush on that bakery down the street! 🧭💖🥐"
Sex before marriage is a sin unless you do it doggy style, because all dogs go to heaven. Follow me for more biblical loopholes.
Commentary:
I didn’t see this in the Bible study guide, but I’m definitely interested in the director’s cut. 😂📖🐶
The fewer friends at your birthday party means more cake for you. Follow me for more life hacks.
Commentary:
"Finally, a math equation I can get behind: fewer friends = more cake! 🎂🍰😋 #CakeEconomics"
When you bury a body, cover it with endangered plants, so it’s illegal to dig it up. Follow me for more gardening tips!
Commentary:
"Who knew that your backyard burial could also double as a botanical sanctuary? Remember, nothing protects your secrets quite like an endangered species—just don't forget to water the evidence! Stay tuned for more quirky gardening advice and unconventional life hacks!"