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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡©πŸ‡° has bookmarked:

Get in loser. We’re going on a guilt trip.

Someone from πŸ‡―πŸ‡΅ has downloaded:

Welcome to middle age. β€œI carried a watermelon” has gone from a movie quote to something you tell your orthopedist.

Someone from πŸ‡ΏπŸ‡¦ has downloaded:

Stomach: I will now demonstrate a blue whale’s mating call.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡Ώ has downloaded:

How is it still this week?

Someone from πŸ‡·πŸ‡Ό has viewed:

My phone just filmed a 2 hour documentary about life inside my purse.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡© has downloaded:

We do it every night. Annoy each other.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡© has copied:

“This was on sale!” is why I’m always broke.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡Ή has downloaded:

Social media may have been a mistake.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡± has copied:

If you wait until the last minute to do something, it only takes a minute to do it.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡² has downloaded:

I really admire the suns ability to be exactly where my car’s visor can’t block it out.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

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2334 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,496

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15,197

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12,496

Updated

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3,439

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Trending via Telegram:

British people be like “It’s Chewsday, innit?”

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Does anyone know if it’s possible to buy the transcripts of audiobooks? Thanks!

Spotted on Messenger:

I’m so bored, I’m gonna join a poly-relationship and stage a coup and kick the main one out.

Spotted on YouTube:

I like waiters. They bring a lot to the table.

Trending via LinkedIn:

I was about to organise my closet, but I then I found what I was looking for.

Live now on Pinterest:

My anti-theft device in my car is that it’s manual.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Since I stopped texting first, I haven’t heard from a lot of people in a while.

Trending via Slack:

And now begins the yearly tradition of writing the incorrect year on everything, for the next 3 months.

Live now on Slack:

I’m no expert, but I don’t think the United Kingdom is very united.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Waffles are just pancakes with abs.

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Welcome to Wordgag! πŸ˜‰βœŒοΈ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. πŸ˜‚πŸ’₯

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Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

2334 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,496

Funny Quotes Topics

15,197

Funny Quotes Images

12,496

Updated

12 minutes ago

Users Online

3,460

Funny Quotes of the Month πŸš€

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡· has bookmarked:

She’s probably just not using her phone right now for the first time ever in her whole life.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡² has downloaded:

Airport security asked me if I’ve seen anything unusual. I just paid $18 for a coke & a sandwich. Let’s start with that.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡¦ has shared:

Back in the good old days, we didn’t have to trim our toenails, they just got wore down naturally from running from dinosaurs.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡¬ has shared:

Twitter actually is my diary, so you’re not allowed to get mad at the things I post. You’re not even supposed to be reading this. Why were you going through my stuff?

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡² has viewed:

My fridge has brought more light into my life than most people.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡± has shared:

My kids couldn’t care less about personal hygiene unless we are running late somewhere.

Someone from πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Ύ has copied:

After my death, I’ll be very busy. The list of people to whom I want to appear as a ghost is getting longer every day.

Someone from πŸ‡­πŸ‡· has copied:

I always knew I’d get old. How fast it happened was a bit of a surprise though.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡ͺ has downloaded:

I’ve finally found out what chronology is. And it’s about time.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡© has bookmarked:

Not arguing with people anymore, I’m just gonna say β€œit makes sense that you would think that”.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Just shared via Discord:

The future is buffering.

Going viral on Facebook:

Every time I wanna quit, I remember horses don’t stop.

Making waves on Instagram:

My teen would like you to know I ruined her life when I did her laundry today.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I wonder how my close personal beloved friend Taylor Swift is doing today.

Spotted on Threads:

I always cook with wine. Sometimes I even add it to the food.

Shared recently on YouTube:

The male urge to tell you what business used to be located there back in his day.

Just shared via Telegram:

Why, as a hair, would you even wanna be ingrown. Like why are you doing that?

Shared recently on Instagram:

We can do things two ways. My way or the right way.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Dear brain, please stop thinking so much exactly when it’s time to fall asleep.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I look stable, but I talk to animals, and wait for them to reply.

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