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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

Since you’re all so in love, switch phones for Valentine’s Day!

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

Having to pay to read scientific and scholarly articles is a really disgusting and pathetic practice.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

Really looking forward to the day my teenager starts speaking English again.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

Going viral on X is like winning a lotto during the apocalypse.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

I really thought adulthood would be 50% freedom and 50% fun. Turns out it’s 100% bills.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

Whoever said money can’t buy happiness, clearly never paid for a divorce.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

Pesto is just an Italian word that means “produced by pounding”, so in a way we are all pesto.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

I got a lot of Jedi advice for somebody who could be turned to the dark side by moderate traffic.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

You’ll be fighting for your life financially and that’s when all your toiletries finish at the same time.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

One week of daily crunches and I have abs…urdly underestimated how long it will take to see results.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2394 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,556

Funny Quotes Topics

15,236

Funny Quotes Images

12,556

Updated

22 minutes ago

Users Online

3,446

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I find it sad that my universal remote does not control the universe. Not even remotely.

Breaking via WeChat:

I do not know how to put this gently, but part of being a good driver is using the gas and brake as little as humanly possible.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I named my eraser Confidence because it gets smaller after every mistake I make.

Shared recently on Discord:

I don’t know which aunty needs to hear this, but focus on your own child.

Going viral on WeChat:

Whitening my teeth by getting a tan.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Haunted Houses this year are just gonna have the news on.

Trending via Discord:

My wife is pretty excited about going away this weekend so I’m not sure she knows I’m coming with her.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Wisdom of the day: Don’t do anything you don’t want to explain to the paramedic.

Just shared via Threads:

I finally used a screw from the random screw collection I’ve been accumulating for 25 years, and I’ve never felt so alive.

Going viral on Facebook:

Being single is so crazy. What do you mean there’s No One?

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2394 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,556

Funny Quotes Topics

15,236

Funny Quotes Images

12,556

Updated

22 minutes ago

Users Online

3,461

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

…and so ends another week of me not becoming unexpectedly rich.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

People who talk about fruit having too much sugar scare me so bad. Please get back, you wicked witch!

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

My husband accidentally locked himself out of the house, and I didn’t hear him knocking until I finished eating the rest of his cheesecake. So weird.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

My mirror needs a screenshot button.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

Every weekend has two days: Saturday and It’s Monday Tomorrow.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

The Scream movies were believable in the ’90s, but no one with any common sense answers unknown numbers on their phones anymore.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

Plot twist: weed is addicted to me.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

Booked an escape room but just to get away from everyone. No plans of escaping.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

I put the hot in psychotic.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Turns out that ending meetings with “have the day you deserve” has made me some enemies at work.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via X:

The art of today’s art is to persuade people that it’s art.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

December. A desperate celebration of an end.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

How many calories does an audible sigh burn? Because I don’t think my Apple Watch is giving me credit for them.

Going viral on Slack:

The real reason for global warming is that today’s young people are nowhere near as cool as we were back then.

Spotted on WeChat:

No matter how old you are, when the kitchen roll is empty, you have a telescope.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Sorry about my behavior as of late. I have plastic in my brain.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

9am: anything is possible. 2pm: maybe tomorrow.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Sorry I lied when I said “I can’t complain.”

Just shared via Pinterest:

She is both the storm and the shelter.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Why do we call it tuna fish? Is there any other tuna out there that’s not a fish?

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