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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

I see WWIII is about to kick off again. I’d best cancel the milk and get the cat in.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

Sorry for levitating at the end of your bed all night, I just think you’re really cute.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

My 3 weeks without sweets were over after 12 hours. Proof that time runs faster with increasing age.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

I am just a man, a man who told a woman to calm down, so I guess this is goodbye.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

The incontinent optimist sees the bladder as half empty.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

I’m not religious, but if someone is turning water into wine, let’s take a second look.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

It’s normal that my retirement plan is 100% contingent on me finding buried treasure at some point, right?

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

The only difference between hungry and horny is where you insert the cucumber.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

Halloween is the only day you can ghost someone and blame it on being festive.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

That feeling when it’s Friday, you blink once, and somehow it’s Monday again.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

823 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,985

Funny Quotes Topics

13,927

Funny Quotes Images

10,985

Updated

37 minutes ago

Users Online

3,442

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Threads:

Sorry for the things I said when I thought you weren’t listening.

Live now on Facebook:

If your kids aren’t drinking enough water, tell them it’s bedtime.

Making waves on YouTube:

My dentist plays country music, so it’s like a double torture.

Going viral on Slack:

Mercury is no longer in retrograde, so never trust a cow because the sun can’t swim.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Stop eating around the bush or whatever the saying is.

Just landed via WeChat:

As a child, all I wanted was as to be a time traveller, like my grandson and his grandson before him.

Making waves on Messenger:

Newborns cry because they’re being evicted.

Trending via Twitch:

The week between Christmas and New Year’s should be studied as it is clearly a wormhole, disturbing time and space.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Not to brag, but I ate all of my bananas before they turned brown. Don’t be jealous.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Bought a house plant so I wouldn’t be the only one dying of dehydration around here.

Home » Funny Cautionary Quotes

Funny cautionary quotes

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All funny cautionary quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm sleep social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

823 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,985

Funny Quotes Topics

13,927

Funny Quotes Images

10,985

Updated

37 minutes ago

Users Online

3,443

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Netflix needs to stop asking if I’m still watching and start asking if I moved the laundry to the dryer yet.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

I can’t believe I’m supposed to obey ALL the traffic laws ALL the time.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

So you mean to tell me a stress ball is not for throwing at people who stress you out.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

Shoutout to all ladies dating silently without making noise on social media. May God give you another man as a bonus.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

I start off my mornings with coffee and low expectations.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

I love being wrong, it’s just like being right except easier and I get to be stupid, which is my favorite thing.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

Can we get some A.I. to pick plastic out of the ocean, or do all the robots need to be poets?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

I always ask for a receipt so I can keep them in my purse for 86 years.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

Currently helping my kids find the chocolate that I ate last night.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has viewed:

My biggest fear is waking up and being in the Renaissance era or something. Imagine having the knowledge of hot dogs but lacking the tools to make them.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Discord:

They should invent a customer service center that isn’t “currently experiencing higher than normal call volume”.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Three drinks in and that skateboard outside is looking rideable.

Spotted on Slack:

Those astronauts that just landed? They should be greeted by chimpanzees on horses.

Trending via Pinterest:

Some of us better hope Santa doesn’t check social media, because if he does, all we’re getting for Christmas is therapy.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I don’t want to adult anymore. Don’t even want to be human. I want to be a goat. Jump around randomly, eat what I want, and head-butt anyone who annoys me.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I don’t like talking to people with an IQ lower than the room temperature.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Being weird never goes out of style.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I wonder if my date ever found her way out of that corn maze.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

That little stroll to the coffee maker makes me happy every morning.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I respect the moon’s unwillingness to be photographed on a phone.

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