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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

Self-care is putting your face on a very soft cat.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

Marry the man who treats your dumb questions like they’re NASA-level problems.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

Anyone know how to create an Outlook rule that sends every email to junk, deletes it, blocks the sender, and sets my laptop on fire?

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

Why do Marvel movies need 3 hours to accomplish what The Powerpuff Girls did in 11 minutes?

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

Stop blaming yourself for your failures. Learn astrology and blame the planets.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

I’m not tispy. I’m merry.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

If I were a mouse, I’d say things like “cheesed to meet you”.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

My body is in shock this morning from having to wake up early and wear hard pants.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

A 12 step program but it’s just me getting off the couch.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

Always be kind. You never know who has subscriptions to your favorite streaming apps.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

832 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,994

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,994

Updated

36 minutes ago

Users Online

3,444

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on X:

You know you’re getting old when you clean the house to the music you used to go out to.

Freshly posted on Discord:

You know you’re getting old when you can’t walk past a bathroom without thinking, “I may as well go while I’m here.”

Breaking via Twitch:

Now I understand why old people sit outside just to sit outside.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

I am like the weather. Temporarily friendly.

Trending via Discord:

If you play guitar in a band, always make sure to look like it hurts to play.

Just shared via Telegram:

Today, I noticed that the cover of my ironing board was wrinkled, and I laughed at the irony. Then I laughed again because of the word “irony.”

Live now on Facebook:

Day 12 without chocolate: Lost all hearing in my left eye.

Making waves on Snapchat:

How do you politely tell someone that they ruined your life?

Making waves on Twitch:

Without freedom of speech, we wouldn’t know who the idiots are.

Just shared via Threads:

Polar bears drinking Coca Cola is my favorite holiday vibe.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm sleep social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

832 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,994

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,994

Updated

36 minutes ago

Users Online

3,444

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

Got a new high score on my bathroom scale.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

Watched Titanic for the 14th time. Still sobbing. Still yelling, “SCOOT OVER, COW!” like it’ll change the ending.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

Be the nonsense you wish to see in the world.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

I get it, credit cards, I’ve reached my limit too.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

Any tips on being smart? For someone just getting into thinking.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

According to the amount of bacon I just cooked. I’m a family of 8.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

I can’t wait until I’m old enough to pretend I can’t hear.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

It’s been my experience that people seem a lot nicer before we get married.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

A Monday every week is excessive.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

Nice tots you got there. Be a shame if someone tatered em.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Autocorrect has become our worst enema.

Trending via Facebook:

“Grey’s Anatomy” but it’s told entirely through the lens of the hospital’s HR department.

Going viral on Messenger:

If I’ve offended you with my posts, I humbly apologize, I honestly did not think you could read.

Just shared via Instagram:

Job interview: Where do you see yourself in five years? Me: Hopefully on a sabbatical.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

The longer I stay home, the more homeless I look.

Just landed via Slack:

I am not someone you have to host if you invite me, because I will have canceled.

Just landed via Snapchat:

It’s called a “sports car” because getting out of one after 40 is a physical event.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

I pretend I don’t care about stuff, but that’s only because I have no idea what’s going on around me at any given time.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

I’ve been locked out of Tinder because of “unusual activity”. I must’ve got a match.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Pomegranates are worth the mess.

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