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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

Sorry, I don’t think I can hang out this weekend, my 4-year-old is still telling a joke.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

Whoever’s been in charge of the weather for the last few weeks seems to have fallen asleep on the couch with the remote control in their hand.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

It was so hot today, I thought I was going to be cremated.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

Ratatouille is hilarious because the villain wasn’t even evil; he just didn’t want food cooked by rats?!?

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

I’m no Hobbit, but I do often walk blindly into some rather dodgy situations.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

Avocado toast at a cafe: $10. Avocado toast from Uber Eats: $25. Avocado toast made at home: $550 (my labor is worth $115 a minute).

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

Every time I wanna quit, I remember horses don’t stop.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

Not a fan of frozen pizza. Too cold, in my opinion.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has copied:

When I get the vibe from someone that fitting in is super important to them my first instinct is to bite them.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and then wake up beautiful.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2434 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,596

Funny Quotes Topics

15,265

Funny Quotes Images

12,596

Updated

28 minutes ago

Users Online

3,467

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I’m a multi-tasking procrastinator. I can put off multiple things at once.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Currently helping my husband look for his $20 I spent yesterday.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I’m not athletic, but I’m good at jumping to conclusions.

Making waves on Reddit:

Being a serial killer is much like being a comedian, in that you either hit it big and get your own Netflix special, or you spend eternity popping up on shitty podcasts.

Just shared via X:

I’m as single as a one Dollar bill, and I don’t need any change.

Live now on TikTok:

You’ve agreed to go out with me, so that’s going to immediately count against you.

Making waves on Reddit:

You are my favorite dirty thought.

Trending via LinkedIn:

It’s the weekend, so naturally, I’m going to spend 48 hours doing nothing, and still be exhausted.

Going viral on Messenger:

I really think my coworkers and I deserve an Oscar for acting like everything at work is fine.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I’ve already sent Santa a short letter this week to say hello. Not that he thinks I only get in touch if I want something.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2434 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,596

Funny Quotes Topics

15,265

Funny Quotes Images

12,596

Updated

28 minutes ago

Users Online

3,466

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

You think you’re aging well and then you feel an earlobe hair blowing in the wind.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

Do u guys also have a story in your head, and when you’re bored, you just add more to it and continue from where you left off?

Someone from 🇸🇻 has viewed:

I like that blood pressure kits come with a free, handy zip-up bag that your stuff will never fit in again once you take it out.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

Don’t rub your happiness in people’s faces this Valentine’s Day. Let the couples enjoy themselves for once.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

I’ve been commissioned to kiss you on the lips. I need to get this done by tonight.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

As a Dad, you always want your kids to be prepared for real life, that’s why trolling them is so vital.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

Nobody cleans better than someone who’s pissed off.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

Confuse a restaurant manager today by telling her how good the service was.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

I love when toddlers passionately talk to you about absolutely nothing.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

Hey man, your fly is down. Let me get that for you.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

No one shoots at your feet and tells you to dance anymore.

Making waves on Instagram:

Non-alcoholic beer is like a vibrator without batteries: it fills you up nicely but without the buzz…

Making waves on TikTok:

Due to personal reasons, I will be screaming into a pillow.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

When I was a kid, I thought cicadas were the sound sunshine makes when it’s real hot outside.

Breaking via Messenger:

Tell your dog I said woof woof.

Just shared via Messenger:

Anyone know if we got the meek inheriting the Earth today?

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Celebrities should not be allowed to name children.

Trending via Facebook:

Is there really anything worse than being forced to watch a video on someone else’s phone and having to pretend to laugh for 2 minutes?

Reported on Twitch:

Some people are so fake, their lock screens don’t recognize them.

Trending via Telegram:

Why is everyone looking for intelligent life in space? Can we please start on Earth first?

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