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91 Funny dog quotes

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  • Are French bulldogs actually French? They seem kinda Puerto Rican.

    Commentary:
    “French bulldogs: the international playboys of the dog world 🇫🇷💃 Are they French or Puerto Rican? The mystery deepens! 🤔🐶 #FrenchieConfusion”

  • What if your dog one day just randomly said โ€œNobody is going to believe youโ€ and never spoke again.

    Commentary:
    Can you imagine the stunned look on your face if your dog suddenly drops this bombshell on you? 🐶😯 Just imagine the endless possibilities and conspiracy theories that would follow such a declaration! 🤔🐾 And to top it off, the dog’s vow of silence afterward would only add to the mystery and hilarity of the situation! 🤫😂

  • Family guy is so insane, because why were people dating that dog?

    Commentary:
    “Family Guy truly pushes the boundaries of surrealism – where else would you find humans falling for a talking dog? 🐶❤️ It’s a love story for the ages, or should we say for the ‘paws’! 🤪 #FamilyGuyFun”

  • I think my dog always follows me to the bathroom because I always follow him outside and he thinks that’s the way it works.

    Commentary:
    🐶 “Why do dogs always want to accompany us to the bathroom? Well, maybe it’s just their way of returning the favor for all those outdoor potty breaks we give them! It’s a ‘you scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours… or sniff yours’ kinda deal!” 🚽🤣

  • Sorry Iโ€™m late, my dog was sleeping in the shape of a donut and I had to take so many photos.

    Commentary:
    “Sounds like a legitimate reason for being fashionably late! 🍩📸 Who can resist capturing such adorable donut-shaped moments, right? Next time, just blame it on the dog – guaranteed no one will be mad! 😄🐶 #Priorities”

  • Whenever someone asks me if my dog is adopted I respond with, โ€œno, sheโ€™s biologically mine.โ€

    Commentary:
    “Next time someone questions if your dog is adopted, hit ’em with that ‘biologically mine’ sass! 🐾 Don’t mess with the paw-sonalities in this pack! 🤣 #FurReal #DoggyDNA”

  • I walked into a holiday party, saw someone else already playing with the dog, and realized theyโ€™d stolen my entire social strategy.

    Commentary:
    🐶🎉 “I walked into a holiday party, excited to mingle, only to find my soulmate playing with the dog like it’s the last piece of cake! Guess I need to paws and rethink my social game plan. Who knew my competition would be a four-legged furry charmer? 🤷‍♂️🐾 #DoggoStealsTheShow”

  • My only chance at a big house in the country is if I become a rescue dog.

    Commentary:
    Looks like you’re barking up the right tree! 🏡🐾 Who knew that becoming a rescue dog could lead to the ultimate ruff life in the countryside? 🐶💼 Time to start perfecting those tail-wagging skills and fetching those dreams! 🐕✨ #RescueDogGoals

  • I wish I could be as excited about being awake as my dog is about me being awake.

    Commentary:
    Isn’t it funny how our furry friends can be so full of energy and excitement, ready to take on the day at the crack of dawn? 🐶☀️ Meanwhile, we humans stumble around looking for that elusive cup of coffee, still trying to convince ourselves that mornings are a good idea. Maybe we should take a leaf out of our dog’s book and embrace that morning enthusiasm – or at least aim for half of their level of perkiness! 😉

  • My dog sure does give a lot of side eye for someone without a job.

    Commentary:
    🐶😒 “My dog sure does give a lot of side eye for someone without a job. Honestly, if side-eyeing was a paying gig, my furball would be living his best life! Maybe I should start charging him rent for all that sassy attitude.” 😄 #UnemployedButUnbothered

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