Funny Dog Quotes That Will Have You Laughing with Your Pooch! 🐶😂

Who called them sea lions and not soggy doggies?

6 months ago3 months ago

My dog and I play this game, it’s called “What Are You Chewing On Now?” It goes both ways.

6 months ago3 months ago

My dog is quite vain. Whenever the doorbell rings, he thinks it’s for him.

6 months ago3 months ago

Paw Patrol is just annoying. Exactly how long do dogs live again on average?

6 months ago3 months ago

Never understood why people train their dogs to sit pretty or roll over when there are useful tricks like empty the dishwasher or fold the laundry.

Jun 17, 20243 months ago

I don’t have kids or a dog. What can I bring into a bar that will make everyone mad?

Jun 17, 20243 months ago

When I take a walk, I bring dog treats and people treats. I almost never mix them up.

Jun 11, 20243 months ago

My boss doesn’t want dogs in the office. But he didn’t say anything about alpacas.

Jun 11, 20243 months ago

I have now learned the moonwalk. It’s visually the coolest way to get fresh dog poop off the soles of your shoes.

Jun 4, 20243 months ago

Being a dog must be wild, everyone you meet is your masseuse.

May 29, 20243 months ago

Men are like dogs. They’re actually cute, but having my own would be too much work for me.

May 20, 20243 months ago

Dogs naturally form packs, and if left undisturbed, will teach themselves how to play poker.

Oct 19, 20233 months ago

All dogs go to heaven, but I never see them in church.

Oct 17, 2023Oct 17, 2023

I’m basically a taxi today for the kids and dogs.

Oct 15, 2023Oct 15, 2023

I could never give up my dog, he knows too much.

Oct 11, 2023Oct 11, 2023

I’m so single. When they ask me for an emergency contact, I put the neighbor’s dog.

Sep 30, 2023Sep 30, 2023

If dogs ever learn to talk, I want everyone to keep in mind that mine is a big fat liar.

Sep 30, 2023Sep 30, 2023

A man rejecting my advances can’t hurt me. I have a dog who leaves the bed every time I climb in.

Sep 28, 2023Sep 28, 2023

If my dog knew how many photos I have of him sleeping, he’d file a restraining order against me.

Sep 25, 2023Sep 25, 2023

I wish my doctor would put down a little treat to distract me like my vet does for my dog.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 23, 2023

I’m just saying, no dog has ever ghosted me.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 23, 2023

Nothing makes me more stabby than when my husband ignores me and starts talking to the dog.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 23, 2023

My dog pisses on every election sign regardless of political party so I have no idea who he is voting for.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 28, 2023

You don’t scare me. You’re not the evil eye I get from my dog when I make him get up from the couch so I can lay down.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 29, 2023

My dog just tracked and successfully located a folium lanceolatum, more commonly known as a leaf.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 23, 2023

I’ve folded seven page corners of the book I’m reading. That’s 49 in dog ears.

Sep 22, 2023Oct 12, 2023

Taking a dog named shark to the beach is a bad idea.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 28, 2023

I learned that when dogs lean against you it’s their version of hugging and now every time my dog leans against me my eyes start leaking.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 23, 2023

Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years. Dogs run and they live for 15 years. Turtles do nothing and live for 150 years. Lesson learned.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 23, 2023

Handle every stressful situation like a dog. If you can’t eat or play with it, just pee on it and walk away.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 28, 2023