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Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

Men microdose bicuriousness by asking what you’d do for a million dollars.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

April fools prank: replace all the sugar in your house with cocaine.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

Being single allows you to do a lot of things. For example, standing naked in the kitchen at night and eating cold pizza.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

The government even made aliens boring.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

All of humanities problems could be solved with a large meteor.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

There is a house I drive by most days and I can never tell if they are having a yard sale or that is just how they live.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

Play the Grindr notification noise at Christmas dinner to see which conservative relatives panickedly check their phone ringer.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

I walked into a holiday party, saw someone else already playing with the dog, and realized they’d stolen my entire social strategy.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

Engaging in deforestation (trimming my bush).

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

I’m afraid that AI will quickly realize that the biggest problem on Earth is humans – and then solve the problem.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,965

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Slack:

“Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go” by “Wham” encourages you to do something you shouldn’t do.

Seen just now on Facebook:

My friends put their kid to bed and then made us ice cream sundaes, which is exactly what I assumed was happening when my parents put me to bed.

Going bananas on Twitch:

Bruce Lee had a faster older brother named Sudden Lee.

Just landed via Pinterest:

People should be able to call in healthy: “Look, I’m not coming into the office today. I feel really good and I don’t want to waste it on being at work.“

Shared recently on WeChat:

Plot Twist: Your taxes cheated on you.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I’m only grumpy when I’m awake.

Shared recently on Facebook:

They should make a drug that recreates the feeling of having your number called earlier than expected.

Going viral on Instagram:

If you knock down a policeman, they’ll get backup.

Just shared via Twitch:

I’m often mistaken for an adult because of my age.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I do not like FaceTime unless we’re best friends or I’m in love with you.

Home » Funny Doze Quotes

Funny doze quotes

New funny doze quotes 👇

Why can’t men admit when they doze off? What’s wrong with them?

0

1 month ago

admit, doze, doze off, humor, men, sleep, stereotype, wakefulness, why, wrong

All funny doze quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

88 shares on Reddit this month:

I wanna become so financially stable that God uses my pockets to bless others.

93 shares on Twitch this month:

If I were Juliet, I would NOT be pleased to find a man standing under my balcony at midnight. Sir, I am in my jim-jams.

12 shares on X this month:

Being awake is the worst.

75 shares on Pinterest this month:

Ever since I was little, I knew I wanted people to watch how they speak to me.

34 shares on Threads this month:

I am in favor of equal pay for men on OnlyFans.

20 shares on Instagram this month:

Y’all liking my posts feels like a little forehead kiss.

72 shares on Instagram this month:

Scientists just confirmed that our dreams were real in another reality.

64 shares on Reddit this month:

I feel like I’m in season 5 of my life, and the writers are just making ridiculous shit happen to keep it interesting.

22 shares on Facebook this month:

Show me in the employee handbook where it says I can’t make weird noises in my cubicle.

79 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m getting targeted ads about chin fat and I’m offended by the relevance.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

My favorite game is to guess if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor position, or a brain tumor.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

My problem with Christmas shopping is that I keep seeing things that I like… for me.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has viewed:

Careful, “friend”. One more word about Shakira and you might find out just how fast I can draw this blade.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

Good morning, did you have a nice weekend? I ask my many open work tabs.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

Thinking about writing my own eulogy because I don’t want my loved ones to say I’m a control freak.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

Talking to some people is like folding a fitted sheet.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

“Stop recording everything and just enjoy the moment” is asking me for videos from last night.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

Cool times create cool guys.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

I’m either freezing, peeing, or starving.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

Forget all this adulting stuff, let’s bring back Saturday morning cartoons.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Reddit:

Much like a candle, I was tall when I was young, but I get shorter as I grow old.

Trending via Instagram:

This too shall pass, but what the hell?

Making waves on Threads:

Life is too short, and death is too long.

Trending via WeChat:

True romantics have made peace with the possibility of lifelong solitude.

Live now on X:

Dating over 40 is like Hide and Seek but no one is looking for you.

Shared recently on Reddit:

If you’re going to text your boss that you’re an hour late, make sure you end with, “I’m bringing you a ham and cheese croissant.”

Just landed via Instagram:

That “so we done?” be saving the relationship every time.

Trending via Instagram:

So annoying when your family knocks on the toilet door and asks what you’re doing. I’m baking a cake. HBU?

Just landed via WhatsApp:

You get what you pay for. Unless the delivery man leaves it on your doorstep. Then the fastest person on your street gets what you paid for.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Spotify Wrapped isn’t enough, I want an Excel spreadsheet of my listening habits.

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Activity Log ✨

Funny doze quotes

New funny doze quotes 👇

Why can’t men admit when they doze off? What’s wrong with them?

All funny doze quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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