Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

Hey there, Delilah, we know you broke that dude’s heart.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

“Have AI summarize this email for you!” No thanks, I can read what the person actually said in the way they intended.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

What doesn’t kill you makes you weird at intimacy.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

Yeah, I’ll get up soon, I just need to look at the internet first. Yes, the whole thing.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

I may not understand women, but cheeseburgers have never sent me mixed signals, and for that they’ll always have my heart.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

How can vampires enjoy drinking our hot blood in the summer and other thoughts that keep me up at night.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

Is this art or trash?

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

Buying books and reading them are actually two entirely different hobbies.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

Rom-com idea: Gozilla +1. Godzilla gets invited to a wedding but struggles to convince anyone to go with him.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

They should let me go inside everyones house just to see.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,356

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Reddit:

Don’t let anyone ruin your day. Be a man. Ruin it yourself.

Making waves on Twitch:

If I was lying down and someone came up and gave me tons of kisses and smooshed my face, I’d love it. I don’t know what my cat’s problem is.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Sorry, I didn’t text back. I don’t like talking to people anymore.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I don’t hide from my problems, I just ignore them until they lose interest.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Yabba dabba doo used to be a rad way to start a Saturday.

Live now on Instagram:

I need to know the brand of toothbrush my neighbor has. I hear it buzzing sometimes an hour at a time and she’s clearly enjoying it.

Live now on WhatsApp:

There is too much money in the world for me to be broke.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Good news, I just decided I don’t care about anything anymore.

Going viral on Reddit:

Welcome to middle age: your chin looks lonely; here’s another one.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Wake up, the thinking isn’t going to overthink itself.

Funny errand quotes

Funny errand quotes bring a splash of humor to those everyday to-do lists we all love to hate 🛒😂 Whether it’s battling the never-ending grocery run or dodging laundry piles, these witty sayings turn mundane chores into moments of laughter 🎉🧹 Ready to see errands in a whole new light? Let’s dive into some hilarious takes that make the ordinary feel extraordinary! 🚀🛍️

New funny errand quotes 👇

All funny errand quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

55 shares on WhatsApp this month:

This is my phone. I text back when I want to.

15 shares on Threads this month:

Anyone who doesn’t like me snoring, doesn’t deserve me moaning either.

94 shares on Messenger this month:

Don’t be fooled by what your kids will eat at someone else’s house.

40 shares on Discord this month:

I often choose gift bags instead of wrapping, not just out of laziness, but also because I have the fine motor skills of a drunken panda.

92 shares on Facebook this month:

Coworker: Where are you going after work? Me: Away from you.

99 shares on Slack this month:

ALF is what happens when you are high on drugs in the 80s.

49 shares on Snapchat this month:

Never underestimate the healing power of not watching the news.

18 shares on Instagram this month:

Coffee doesn’t solve all my problems. But it definitely stops me from constantly creating new ones.

97 shares on Pinterest this month:

My dental plan is, “I guess I’ll just chew on this side of my mouth from now on.”

92 shares on Pinterest this month:

Weird how I can’t seem to reach anything at the grocery store when hot men are around.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Men love to show you a YouTube video. It is a sign of deep respect in their culture.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m just a Whole Foods girl on a Walmart budget.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Wish I could step out of my body and take my own damn pictures.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Just looked around and realized it’s everyone’s first time living.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Thank you, God, for another day. Let’s get this 12-hour screen time.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I miss having that butterfly feeling. People give me roach vibes at this point.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Excuse me, but would you sign my petition to ban petitions?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Not now, honey. I’m talking to strangers on the internet.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Tonight, my poor liver has to pay again for what went wrong during the week.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Babe, are you OK? You’ve barely fulfilled the prophecy.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,414

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

Anyone know if we got the meek inheriting the Earth today?

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

There is no sex. I lied. You are gonna lay here and take personality quizzes with me.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

I love all mythical creatures. Vampires, werewolves, unicorns, kids who listen.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

I refuse to take a single bite of my food until I find something good on TV.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

Dating is the process of meeting someone until you find out what’s wrong with them.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

If I turned into a “teen wolf”, my first order of business would definitely be helping my basketball team get to the local championships.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

Asking doctors about nutrition is like asking software engineers about printers, they really have no idea.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

Shazam but for random noises outside.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

I only have one wish in life… For all my dreams to come true.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

My kids have been joking for weeks about a new Pokémon called Puke-Achu and then they got the stomach flu and brought it to life.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via WeChat:

Can someone write me a note to get out of being a responsible adult?

Live now on YouTube:

My dog just looked me in the eye and said “no one is gonna believe you”, then took a nap.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I’m actually breaking generational curses by surviving my 20s without marrying a man who hates me.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

If you ever think English is not a weird language just remember that read and lead rhyme and read and lead rhyme. But read and lead don’t rhyme, and neither do read and lead.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Happy birthday to everyone, for the rest of your lives. I can’t do this anymore.

Making waves on X:

Jehovah’s Witnesses tell the worst knock knock jokes.

Trending via TikTok:

Therapy isn’t enough. I need to run my brain through the dishwasher.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

All my favorite activities involve a mattress.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Toxic girlfriend who goes through her boyfriend’s calculator app and asks why he’s doing the equations he’s doing.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I’m so single, I have no one to drunk text.

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