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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

I don’t need to touch grass, I need to touch one million dollars cash.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

Please don’t ask me what my hobbies are, I lost interest in life back in 6th grade.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

Unfortunately, I don’t give ugly men a chance, because they wouldn’t give me one if I were the ugly one.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

Men call us “gold diggers” when we expect them to pay for a meal. Honey, a gold digger goes after yachts, not a piece of chicken.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

Liquor on the top shelf is so expensive because the bartender has to stand on their tippy toes to reach it.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

Sure, sex is great, but have you ever closed a dozen tabs after finishing an academic paper?

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

Normalize responding to work emails with: “What the hell are you talking about?”

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

For whom the doom scrolls!

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

Marriage is so scary. What do you mean I can’t have my own room?

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

Being liked at work comes with so many perks, you could be late as hell, and everyone is just happy to see you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Dec 31, 2025

3,364

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I think I’ma end the year with a plot twist, everyone hold on tight.

Seen just now on Slack:

Want to come over? We can trauma dump, take a nap, and then order a pizza and watch a movie.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Fyi, if you like listening to “rain sounds,” they’re almost all recordings of chicken being fried.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Once I see a vein on your forehead while we arguing, I’ll let you be.

Seen just now on Discord:

You’re supposed to store a treasure in your cleavage that’s why it’s called a chest.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I thought my friends in their 60s were making love in the other room but they were just putting on their socks.

Freshly posted on X:

Sometimes I watch people do their jobs, and I’m like, damn, you might benefit from a little imposter syndrome, actually.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Being gracefully insane is the secret to a happy life.

Freshly posted on X:

Doggy style is out cat style is in. It’s where I let you touch me until I’m satisfied then ignore you and scratch you if you try and touch me again.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

No, I wasn’t dancing. I got harassed by a bumble bee.

Funny family joke quotes

Funny family joke quotes bring laughter and love together in the quirkiest way! 😂👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 Whether it’s silly sibling banter or hilarious parenting moments, these gems light up any family gathering. Ready to share some giggles and create unforgettable memories? Grab your favorite snack 🍿, gather the crew, and dive into a world of smiles and snickers that keep the family bond strong and the fun nonstop! 🎉😄

New funny family joke quotes 👇

Youngest siblings are literally weaponized incompetence, final boss.

0

2 months ago

boss, family, family joke, final, final boss, humor, incompetence, joke, literally, sibling, sibling humor, siblings, weaponized, weaponized incompetence, youngest, youngest sibling
My family asked me what I wanted for Mother’s Day, so I packed their bags and changed the locks.

0

2 months ago

asked, bags, day, family, family joke, humor, humorist, i, joke, lock, locks, me, mother’s, Mother’s Day, packing, prank, wanted
My family was too poor for a gene pool, so we soaked our genes in rye whiskey.

0

2 months ago

alcohol, family, family joke, gene, genetics, humor, joke, pool, poor, poverty, sarcasm, too, whiskey

All funny family joke quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

15 shares on Telegram this month:

Transgender ambulance driver whose pronouns are we/you/we/you/we/you.

13 shares on Discord this month:

I don’t always leave the house, but when I do, I shouldn’t.

28 shares on WeChat this month:

I don’t know why “you made your bed now lie in it” is a bad thing. It sounds great! I’ll even lie in a bed I didn’t make.

25 shares on WeChat this month:

I hate when teachers put “?” on my work, like I don’t know either.

55 shares on X this month:

No, you don’t understand. This is my special mistake. I keep making it because it is very dear to me, like an old friend.

52 shares on Pinterest this month:

“I’m doing better than my parents at my age. They had, like, no followers.”

66 shares on Snapchat this month:

What’s really missing is a day between Saturday and Sunday.

60 shares on TikTok this month:

The rule should be: if you can smell the cookout, you’re invited to the cookout.

81 shares on Twitch this month:

Why there is always a kid crying when I go to the store? Dude, you aren’t the one paying for it. Stop!

75 shares on Messenger this month:

It’s leg day. No, not at the gym, dummy. I’m shaving them.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

None of the parenting books say what to do when your kids start calling you ‘Bruh.’

6 folks are currently checking 👀

My signature move is forgetting someone’s name 2 seconds after they tell me.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

No, I don’t like nature. I can’t respect anything that would so flippantly turn dinosaurs into birds.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s always “you’re so cute when you’re mad,” until the house is on fire.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

They should invent a rom-com where no one has to overhear anything that leads to a huge unnecessary misunderstanding.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

“I’m too young to be forgetting why I walked into a room.”

15 folks are currently checking 👀

If you wanna make someone cry, just show them the earliest year they can retire.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

“Are you getting your period?” God forbid I’m just evil.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

No one flirts better than a guy who’s not interested in you.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can’t it get us out?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,584

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

I like how people say “manage your depression,” like it’s a stock portfolio, but you’re heavily invested in sadness.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

It’s a good thing when your therapist sits down with a bucket of popcorn, right?

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

The cool thing about Twitter is you’re never the craziest one.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

I hate when people ask me what I’m doing tomorrow, I don’t even know what I’m doing today.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has bookmarked:

Switching between brainrot and deep intellectual talks is a skill that only a few acquire.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

Hey, we’re calling off the search party. We found a different guy out there we like more.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

Just saw someone my age running and she wasn’t chasing an ice-cream truck.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

By the time I meet the right person, I’ll probably be the wrong person.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

Why do fruit flies be everywhere but at the supermarket? Ain’t that like their Golden Corral?

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

It takes so much energy to go inside a Walmart.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Discord:

The first time you forgive out of love. The second time out of hope and the third time out of stupidity.

Going viral on Snapchat:

The one nice thing about your friends’ divorces is no one invites you to them.

Breaking via Instagram:

Who would have thought that eating a can of beans would backfire like this?

Just landed via WhatsApp:

A pretty girl like me should be in the sky, sitting on a star.

Going viral on Telegram:

When someone says “I expected more of you”, I’m always like “well who’s fault is that?”

Spotted on WeChat:

I’m going to try and be less of a people pleaser, is everyone ok with that?

Trending via TikTok:

Can you delete that photo of me? It looks exactly the way I look in real life.

Just shared via TikTok:

Some of you need to be visited by the ghost of ‘Quit emailing me so much before Christmas.’

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

Pinterest recipe so long that it’s now a limited series on Netflix.

Seen just now on Slack:

Some people are so judgmental, I can tell by just looking at them.

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