Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

If you collect the crumbs from one Nature Valley granola bar, you can make three more granola bars.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

How old were you when you realized others couldn’t see the matrix?

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

All my bills say “Outstanding.” I guess I am good to go.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

Sometimes, after I’ve completed a task that wasn’t on my to-do list, I’ll add it and then cross it off for the free dopamine boost.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

The possibility of monsters residing underneath your bed is negated when the mattress is positioned on the floor.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

The cheapest way to fly is off the handle.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

Hey bartender, can you turn down the music, please? This guy I just met is trying to explain how baseball works.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

Things I hate about group work: The group.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

I’m bored, but not “read a book for fun” bored.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

I followed my heart, and it led me to the fridge.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

830 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,992

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,992

Updated

7 minutes ago

Users Online

3,437

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Slack:

You told your cat how much you love him, but now it’s morning, the sun is out, you’re sober, and it’s just weird for both of you.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Before I drink, I eat liver so the liquor won’t know which liver to attack.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Another fine day ruined by responsibilities.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Whenever my hormones try to get me to reproduce after all, I go to IKEA and watch the goings-on there. After that, I’m good again.

Seen just now on Twitch:

If someone asks you: ‘Why are you single, don’t you like people?’, answer: ‘Why aren’t you a millionaire, don’t you like money?’

Seen just now on Discord:

I’m so broke, I owe myself money.

Seen just now on Slack:

What doesn’t kill you will text you in 5 months to ask “What are you doing?”

Reported on X:

*Pointing at a mothers shrieking baby* Is this guy bothering you?

Spotted on Discord:

While a leaf blower is a close second, my preferred cleaner is a flamethrower.

Spotted on Slack:

If at first you don’t succeed, try two more times so your failure is statistically significant.

Home » Funny Free Sandwich Quotes

Funny free sandwich quotes

New funny free sandwich quotes 👇

For even more funny free sandwich quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny free sandwich quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm sleep social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

830 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,992

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,992

Updated

7 minutes ago

Users Online

3,434

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

I think the most financially irresponsible thing I’ve done is get my kids to like sushi.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

I’m the guy at Apple who makes sure all your featured photos are your exes and your dog that died.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

Can someone please fix the algorithm of my life?

Someone from 🇦🇬 has bookmarked:

It’s wild that “Jason” is a name from ancient Greece, because it sounds like it was invented in Florida in 1983.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

Just saw someone my age running and she wasn’t chasing an ice-cream truck.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

Pilot is one of the few jobs where you can get fired for going above and beyond.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

Not to sound like a potted plant, but sunlight and fresh air really make a difference.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

Dogs are like chicken nuggets; every time I see one, I want it.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

If I say goodnight and an hour later you see me online, it’s not that I lied; it’s just that I failed.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

You gotta wonder why they just don’t make all bread garlic bread.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

No, I wasn’t dancing. I got harassed by a bumble bee.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

“I asked Grok.” “I asked ChatGPT.” Well, I’ve sacrificed a sheep.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

I am cool with January lasting forever because rent is due February 1.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Having a peanut allergy has to be so wild. Like, imagine you’re at a baseball game and there are people chucking bags of rattlesnakes past your head.

Trending via Messenger:

We need a Disney princess who’s a greedy profiteer, so we can cheer for the poison apple.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Dogs naturally form packs, and if left undisturbed, will teach themselves how to play poker.

Making waves on Twitch:

Women are like apples; I like biting them.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

No one declines an incoming call faster than a 3-year-old watching YouTube.

Making waves on Threads:

You should always wear a helmet when doing dangerous things or talking about politics.

Going viral on Messenger:

8 year gap on resume that just says “karate”.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All fights retarded. 🤪

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴