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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

This year, the feliz is not navidading.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

Never meeting another person again, so if I know you already, congrats!

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

Are you spaghetti because I want you to meat my balls?

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

For Halloween I will go to the beach dressed as a french fry and let the seagulls destroy me.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

Shout-out to the lifeguard who recommended moving the potato to the front of my Speedo.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

Metallica’s “Nothing Else Matters” is my favorite song about that 5 minutes of sleep before the alarm goes off.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

I put the “sexy” in “dyslexic.”

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

My wife just admitted a mistake. What do I have to do now? What does this mean for my future? Help me!

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

I used to work at McDonald’s and we only told ugly people that the ice cream machine was broken. So I have bad news if you were ever denied ice cream.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

Once you realize that the general public is retarded, you stop caring about how crazy you look to them.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,756

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Threads:

Sorry I said your toddler should be in commercials for birth control.

Seen just now on Messenger:

The great thing about playing the trombone is no one knows if you’re good at it or not.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Adulthood is basically just trying to fall asleep at night and stay awake during the day.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Give it to me straight, doc, what can I do to be healthier besides changing my entire lifestyle?

Live now on Twitch:

Who wants to do all my adult stuff for me today?

Trending via Pinterest:

Find someone who cares about you as much as Gmail cares about new devices signing into your account.

Spotted on Instagram:

The goose: Canada’s most violent saxophone.

Just landed via YouTube:

“I’m getting tired of everything being 100 dollars and 100 degrees.”

Just landed via Pinterest:

If you drink enough, any bar can be a karaoke bar.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

It’s this time again when you have to choose between coffee and mulled wine in the morning.

Funny knock knock quotes

New funny knock knock quotes 👇

Jehovah’s Witnesses tell the worst knock knock jokes.

1 month ago

comedy, humor, jehovah’s, Jehovah’s Witness, jokes, knock, knock knock, religion, tell, witness, witnesses, worst

All funny knock knock quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

48 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I once made the irresponsible decision to drink and drive and now I have to live the rest of my days with a coffee stain on my favorite sweater.

72 shares on X this month:

I’m in my thirties, but I still feel like I am in my twenties; then I hang out with people in their twenties, and I’m like nope, definitely in my thirties.

77 shares on Snapchat this month:

Salt is just angry sugar.

69 shares on Facebook this month:

The only things that are really cool in my company are my salary and me.

51 shares on Threads this month:

Maybe making another financially irresponsible decision will fix me.

81 shares on WeChat this month:

Money talks, and also waves goodbye.

82 shares on Threads this month:

Don’t tell me that everything was better in the past. I was there.

41 shares on Slack this month:

*Pointing at a mothers shrieking baby* Is this guy bothering you?

64 shares on WeChat this month:

My plant is drunk, it’s growing in the wrong direction.

44 shares on Discord this month:

Be useless, so nobody can use you.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

Dear Black Friday… We all have big TVs now, put the groceries on sale.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

I love spending my parents’ money, they must pay for bringing me into this world.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

It must be hard to be a rapper knowing at any moment your enemies may make beautiful poems about you.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

If you want to impress me with your car, it should be an ice cream van.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

I eat cake every day because somewhere out there it’s someone’s birthday and I like to celebrate.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

Don’t let me drive if you’re gonna scream every time we almost die.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

I’m terrified of escalators, so I’m taking steps to avoid them.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

You’re really hot. Wanna share microplastics?

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

But are we sure that stomachs are meant to be flat?

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Elections make you feel like we’re all in divorce court waiting to see who gets custody of us.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Mirror, mirror on the wall, why so many fingerprints?

Freshly posted on TikTok:

The first two drinks don’t count if you have social anxiety, they just turn you into a normal person.

Spotted on Threads:

I’m going to get some steel wool so I can crochet myself a new car.

Trending via Discord:

I wish people had mute buttons in real life.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

When I like a song, I repeat it until the artist comes out and ask for water.

Making waves on X:

A perfect metaphor for my life would be “Someone trying to stand up in a hammock.”

Spotted on Telegram:

I thought the noise my husband’s stomach was making was never going to end last night until I realized it was a motorbike outside.

Trending via Facebook:

Cats are probably like: Oh, I should follow you on Litterboxd.

Seen just now on YouTube:

So single the neighborhood cats make ME dinner.

Just shared via Pinterest:

I think this man might be the one, I say right before he dumps me and I never hear from him again.

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Activity Log ✨

Funny knock knock quotes

New funny knock knock quotes 👇

Jehovah’s Witnesses tell the worst knock knock jokes.

All funny knock knock quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨