Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Do crabs underwater think that fishes fly?

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

Lego better be trying to cure child cancer with how much their shit cost.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

Can I come over and shed hair everywhere?

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

I did vote once but only because I thought the line was to a buffet.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

Forgot my glasses, so I’m pointing at a random spot on the menu and hoping for the best.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

I tried to act normal once, worst five minutes of my life.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

If you send a man to war today, he’s gonna go there and take dark exposure aesthetic pics.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

Diabetes was the God of sugar.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

There should be a Mad Max movie that reveals the world outside Australia has actually remained pretty normal.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

Need to clean the fridge, so I’m going to do the responsible thing and drink wine instead.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,415

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Glasses don’t make you look smart, everyone knows you had to fail a test to get them.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Now that I got a library card, I’m moving differently.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Life is like a penis. Sometimes it’s up, sometimes it’s down. But it’s never hard forever.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Whenever I’m sad, you’re there. Whenever I have problems, you’re there. Whenever I lose control, you’re there. Let’s face it, you are bad luck.

Spotted on Threads:

Once you find a pair of pants that fit you perfectly, it’s over for all your other pants.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Seems like paleontologists always have a bone to pick.

Going viral on YouTube:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but if you talk on speakerphone in public, everyone around you hates you.

Seen just now on Twitch:

I need someone to look at me the way I look at memes.

Broadcasted on Threads:

The miracle of DoorDash is that I just pick up my phone, punch a few things into it, and within half an hour I have, at my door, a $52 salad.

Just landed via Telegram:

Imagine the sound a centipede would make if they wore tiny flip flops.

Funny me too quotes

New funny me too quotes 👇

Me, as a therapist: “OMG, me too!”

2 weeks ago

empathy, humor, me, me too, OMG, relatability, therapist, too

All funny me too quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on Twitch this month:

Being excited to get in bed is a different level of adulting.

61 shares on Twitch this month:

Do you think Yoda says “7-6” instead?

58 shares on Twitch this month:

By the time someone says, ‘To make a long story short,’ it’s too late.

76 shares on Messenger this month:

McDonald’s is finally promoting good health by making their food unaffordable.

87 shares on TikTok this month:

If you’re bored when you’re alone, obviously you’re in bad company.

59 shares on Reddit this month:

Life hack: Allow yourself 8–12 hours of alone time every morning to prepare for the day.

65 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?

96 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Everyone on the bus thinks that they are the main character, when in reality the main character is the bus.

14 shares on Snapchat this month:

Just saying “Think about it!” is enough to overwhelm many people these days.

83 shares on TikTok this month:

Going to a wedding really reminds me of the important things in life. Like cake.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

My bra isn’t just padded — it’s also filled with cookie and chip crumbs.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

Kids these days are soft. I’m pretty sure I died once when I was 7, and my mom made me walk it off.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

Nobody supports you like that one internet friend you’ve never met.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

The Gulf of Mexico should’ve been renamed to Sea Señor.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

You can tell you’re getting old when the barber spends less time on the top of your head and more time on your ears.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, “Oh no, it’s a cop”?

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Jehovah’s Witnesses tell the worst knock knock jokes.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

Tattoo idea for men: spider webs in the corners of the receding hairline.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

I’ve found that the easiest way to do burpees is to just not do burpees. No pain, no pain.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has bookmarked:

Our neighbor complained that our cat is always running through his garden. My father said: “Okay, I’ll tell her.”

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Twitch:

Does everyone in the world want to come to my house tomorrow?

Going viral on TikTok:

Weekends now feel like short commercial breaks in a stressful movie.

Shared recently on TikTok:

My favorite thing to do when I see people I know in public is to pretend I didn’t.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Can we call situationships ‘affairs’ again? It sounds more adult and less desperate.

Freshly posted on Slack:

All my favorite activities involve a mattress.

Spotted on Slack:

This call, should’ve been a message in a bottle I never found.

Seen just now on Discord:

The best part of my kid graduating was unsubscribing from the school’s text messages.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

If I let you into my life, I am either emotionally invested or you are a grilled cheese sandwich.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

The problem with leading by example is that no one pays attention.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

I think it’s healthy to be a little horny at all times.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny me too quotes

New funny me too quotes 👇

Me, as a therapist: “OMG, me too!”

All funny me too quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨