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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

In contrast to the ship, the movie Titanic was quite well received in America.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

If you ever get locked out of your house, talk calmly to the lock. We all know that communication is the key.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

Holding back your sarcastic replies takes a lot of inner strength.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

Back in my day, we had to walk to the TV to change the channel. Uphill, both ways!

Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

The only fantasy I have in the bedroom these days is getting 8 hours of sleep.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

The closer you are to nature, the further you are from idiots.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

How many times does one have to open the fridge door before cake appears inside?

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

The only thing keeping me from world domination is a good nap.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

When I was growing up I always wanted to be someone. Now I realize I should have been more specific.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

Shout out to all you people out there who get asked if you’re okay a lot even though that’s the only facial expression you have.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

816 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,978

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,978

Updated

54 minutes ago

Users Online

3,427

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Messenger:

My ex said I had commitment issues but this giant jar of Nutella says otherwise.

Trending via Telegram:

When God closes a door, he opens a window. Unfortunately, we are in a submarine.

Just landed via TikTok:

I may forget what I opened the fridge for but I remember every time anyone has ever wronged me.

Making waves on TikTok:

“Don’t shoot your gun at the hurricane” the government says. I’ll do my own research, thanks.

Freshly posted on Slack:

My birthday wish is for everyone to ignore my birthday.

Making waves on X:

Shout out to Yamaha for being like, “Here’s a cool motorcycle. Also, here’s a cool piano.”

Reported on X:

Forgetting your phone at home is the modern equivalent of leaving your sword behind in medieval times.

Spotted on Slack:

Alexa, turn off the planet.

Trending via X:

You don’t need to explain yourself if you carry a chainsaw.

Reported on Reddit:

My last straw is way longer than I thought.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

816 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,978

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,978

Updated

54 minutes ago

Users Online

3,432

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

On my way to Mordor. You nerds need anything?

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

It’s okay if you don’t like me, not everyone has good taste.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

When I turned into the harbor of marriage, I didn’t know that a warship was anchored there.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

A haunted house, but every room is just learning more about Will & Jada.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

I bet oiling and wrapping potatoes in aluminum foil feels so good for the potato.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

Doing nothing is very hard to do. You never know when you’re finished.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

Can’t. I’m busy taking this Buzzfeed quiz to find out what kind of potato I am.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

Making eye contact with strangers on the sidewalk and saying “it’s crazy that they just let me walk around, haha”.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

Ghost stories sound way scarier with an English accent.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

I may be a beginner at some things, but I have a black belt in shopping.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Telegram:

Sometimes when I get negative feedback I’m like “Hey, only I get to talk to myself that way”.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Some people stay longer in a toilet than in a relationship.

Spotted on WeChat:

The only thing that has grown faster than rents in recent years is the overtime we have to work to pay them.

Trending via Twitch:

At least 80% of my day is spent holding back my inappropriate thoughts.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

For introverts, the worst kind of head-on collision is running directly into the person we’re avoiding at the grocery store.

Trending via Messenger:

When people say, “Stop living in the past,” my thought in turn is, “But the music was so much better then!”

Just shared via Facebook:

Sometimes my toddler throws stuff on the floor and then shouts “OH NO” and that’s kind of like what politicians do.

Going viral on WeChat:

Now that Christmas and New Year are out of the way, we can focus on the things that really matter: My posts.

Making waves on Instagram:

So single the neighborhood cats make ME dinner.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Changed my bio on bumble to “I’m gonna murder ur whole family” and guys still responded.

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