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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

As an exorcist, whenever I hear of some new poor soul possessed by a demon, all I can think is Ka-Ching!

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

Life always has it’s ups and downs. I like to up the music, down the drinks, and then relax and enjoy.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

I don’t need all of these heat advisory warnings on my phone. I’ve been outside. I have skin. I know.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

Nobody gets angrier than a man being accused of something he actually did.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Your nose is in the middle of your face because it is the scenter.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

“She’s so self-centered.” Who’s supposed to be the center of my life? You?

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

I will die on this hill or any hill really. I have no hill preference.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

Wealthy person who has no problems and also meditates sometimes: Meditation is my secret weapon.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2538 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,700

Funny Quotes Topics

15,359

Funny Quotes Images

12,700

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,440

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on WeChat:

I don’t want to be dramatic, but the work week continuously restarting is literally ruining my life.

Making waves on Reddit:

Weird. I’m the only one naked at this gender reveal party.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I don’t want to sleep like a baby, I want to sleep like a cat. 14 hours, no responsibilities, zero regrets.

Going viral on Twitch:

Update on my fitness journey: My wife just handed me a bag of apples at the market and said, “careful, it’s heavy.”

Live now on Telegram:

Do you scroll through Netflix to find a good show for your dog to watch when you leave the house or are you normal?

Trending via Threads:

The worst part about being an adult is that no matter how sad you get, the show must go on.

Going viral on Reddit:

Slipping into something a little more comfortable (psychosis).

Going viral on Instagram:

Stores should accept “I bought this while depressed” as a valid reason for a return.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I’m clumsy but there are upsides. For example, if I finish my chips and I’m sad there’s no more chips, I look in my lap and I always find chips.

Shared recently on WeChat:

It’s like no one in my family appreciates that I stayed up all night overthinking for them.

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Funny miscellaneous quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2538 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,700

Funny Quotes Topics

15,359

Funny Quotes Images

12,700

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,467

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

I want a president who promises no jobs. I don’t want to have a job.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Nobody told me that when you get a husband the ears are sold separately.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

This is no glow. This is the rage that boils inside me.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

Everybody’s back hurts until it’s time to have sexy time.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

I fractured my laziness and dislocated my interest.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

My friend and I had a running joke. She said, “Let’s do a marathon,” and then we both laughed.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

Forget carrying me to bed; carry me to the end of the workweek. Then we can talk.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

I set up my Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, Mary, Joseph and all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

Imagine how scary sharks would be if they wore necklaces made out of our teeth.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

Pretending you don’t notice people staring at you is a skill.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Instagram:

When Chuck Norris was born, the doctor got slapped.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Even in my early 20’s, I was diagnosed with late stage 40’s.

Just shared via TikTok:

You can either have a nice evening or you can help your child with their math homework. You can’t have both.

Making waves on WeChat:

I know life can be tough, but you still gotta wear deodorant.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

You know when a donkey followed Shrek home and just kept talking? That’s what it’s like having kids.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

I can’t work under these festive conditions.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

My toxic trait is binging a show too fast, then getting sad when I have nothing to watch.

Shared recently on Threads:

We should be able to take our arms off when we go to sleep, we have the technology.

Breaking via Threads:

Hey, people, my age. Remember going into the computer lab at school?

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I wonder if the guy who came up with the term “One Hit Wonder” came up with any other phrases?

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