Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

Making friends as an adult is wild because there’s so much lore to catch up on. You’ll be 3 years in and still get random drops like, ‘Oh, by the way, I used to be married.’

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

I’m glad the makers removed all the unnecessary sex scenes from my life, so I can focus on character development.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

I’m so smart, I got rid of cable and now I only have $638 in monthly streaming services.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

Aging isn’t even 1% as scary as whatever is going on with the people trying not to.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

Saying “shut up” before skipping the YouTube ad is literally necessary.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

We should be able to take our arms off when we go to sleep, we have the technology.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

From a very young age, I knew that everyone was wrong and I was right.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

According to the smoke alarm, the food is ready.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

I was going to buy my wife a car for Christmas but then I remembered I don’t live in a commercial.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

You can really tell somebody’s mental state by they hair.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,282

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Authenticity is whispered, but bullshit is broadcasted.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Sex is like tacos. I wish I were having some now.

Making waves on Slack:

A fabric tomato filled with needles. Don’t see that much anymore.

Live now on TikTok:

Sorry, boss, I can’t come into work today. I’m trying to capture the childlike joy of December.

Shared recently on Discord:

Bursting into a million bats the second I see you.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Don’t suffer in silence. Make it everyone’s problem.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

They should build a separate grocery store for people who have actually purchased food before, know how to push a cart, and possess at least an ounce of spatial awareness.

Trending via Facebook:

Taking a phone to school in primary was like smuggling drugs.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.

Just landed via Discord:

Twitter is an abusement park.

Funny mulled quotes

New funny mulled quotes 👇

All funny mulled quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on Snapchat this month:

I would rather walk directly into the ocean than tell people a fun fact about myself.

59 shares on Discord this month:

Weekends are getting shorter and shorter. You blink and it’s already Sunday 5pm.

17 shares on YouTube this month:

Everyone’s all up in arms about how undemocratic the electoral college is and yet we let our weather be decided by a single unelected groundhog.

68 shares on Facebook this month:

I like listening to podcasts because it’s basically getting to enjoy a conversation without having to participate in it.

74 shares on WeChat this month:

We always asked “where is Waldo” but never “who is Waldo hiding from”.

78 shares on Threads this month:

I don’t know what kind of sex makes y’all want a joint bank account, but I ain’t had it yet.

23 shares on Snapchat this month:

When animals lead you to a place, it’s so cute… like, yes, I’m still following. Thank you for constantly turning around to make sure.

28 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I don’t have kids or a dog. What can I bring into a bar that will make everyone mad?

32 shares on Facebook this month:

I hate when you leave your phone on the side, and it brings up that red evil clock.

29 shares on Facebook this month:

Parallel lines have got so much in common, it’s a shame they’ll never meet.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m having people over to stare at their phones later, if you want to come by.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve been heading in the wrong direction for most of my life, but since the earth is round, I’m just going to stick with it and see it through.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Never meeting another person again, so if I know you already, congrats!

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Some things are better left unsaid, which I usually realize after I say them.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

If cats could text you back, they wouldn’t.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

How can I be ready for the future when I’m not even ready to get up in the morning?

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I feel like I’m in jail when I’m around unfunny people for too long.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Be yourself cause no one wants to be like you!

11 folks are currently checking 👀

No, I don’t like nature. I can’t respect anything that would so flippantly turn dinosaurs into birds.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Adulthood is about being able to eat cookies for breakfast, but not doing it because you already ate all the cookies.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,654

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

Putting a blanket over my boss so he thinks it’s night time and goes to sleep.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

I hate to brag, but I’ve been the biggest mistake of numerous people’s lives.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

Your ex is ruining someone else’s life now. You are safe.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

The best addition to any essay is, of course, a condescending tone.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

Remember, you don’t have to worry about being around annoying people in public if you never leave the house.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

I have the bruises of a much more active person.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

I’ve tasted being the bigger person, I’ve also tasted matching energy. I recommend no contact.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

I’ve reached that age where I don’t have to drink to forget because it just happens naturally now.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

Silence is my favourite form of communication in the morning.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Telegram:

Show me in the employee handbook where it says I can’t make weird noises in my cubicle.

Live now on Twitch:

Before I agree to the new year, I wanna read the terms and conditions.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

If you’re feeling a little uneasy about the state of global geopolitics, remember to spend as much time on your phone as possible. The more information you ingest as you scroll, the calmer you will become.

Freshly posted on Discord:

At my age, a trail of clothes leading to the bedroom, means I dropped them on the way from the dryer.

Live now on WhatsApp:

Men playing hard to get when they’re already hard to want, is so funny to me.

Spotted on YouTube:

Got a new Roomba but keeping the old one to see if I can get them to fight.

Just shared via Reddit:

Asking my dentist a question, but sticking my fingers in his mouth before he replies.

Shared recently on Telegram:

You can chill with someone a whole day at the university, and never see them again in your life, lol.

Just landed via Facebook:

Women are like apples; I like biting them.

Going bananas on Discord:

When I’m president, I will add an additional hour between 6 and 7pm.

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