Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

I need a break from me.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

Whenever I’m with real yappers, I realize I might actually be a listener.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

I used to eat my feelings but now it’s so expensive, I might as well go to therapy.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

Christmas lights: the only thing bright around here besides my personality.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

Bought a pair of night vision goggles so that I can easily find the fridge at night without waking my wife.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

While a leaf blower is a close second, my preferred cleaner is a flamethrower.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

In a parallel universe, Mariah Carey is doing her shopping and is sick of hearing me on every store’s speaker system.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

All arguments are solvable. The trick? Get naked.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

Deleting tweets like a writer who burns his manuscripts.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

Having a peanut allergy has to be so wild. Like, imagine you’re at a baseball game and there are people chucking bags of rattlesnakes past your head.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,421

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Telegram:

I’m sorry I used air quotes when I said we were friends.

Trending via Instagram:

I’m not a fan of camping, if I wanted to sleep outside I wouldn’t pay my mortgage.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Some should judge a little less and look at their lives a little more.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Nothing tops a plain pizza.

Going viral on Messenger:

I like my Jims slim and my chances fat.

Trending via TikTok:

“I’m gonna sneak past you.” No you’re not. You’ve alerted me.

Seen just now on X:

I visited my doctor today. He told me my sugar was too high. So I came home and moved it to a lower shelf.

Spotted on WeChat:

The French only eat snails because they don’t like fast food.

Just landed via Threads:

Really looking forward to the day my teenager starts speaking English again.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Sparkling water tastes like that feeling when your foot falls asleep.

Funny people’s quotes

Funny people’s quotes are the perfect dose of laughter 😂 and wit 🤪 to brighten your day! Whether they’re clever one-liners or silly observations, these gems bring smiles 😄 and good vibes wherever they go. Ready to laugh out loud? Dive into the world of humor that’s as unpredictable as your funniest friend 🎉🤣!

New funny people’s quotes 👇

All funny people’s quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

18 shares on Slack this month:

Anyone else brush their teeth in the shower so they can get a little sloppy with it, or is that just me?

96 shares on Snapchat this month:

This is no glow. This is the rage that boils inside me.

96 shares on Threads this month:

Let the example of my fluke success guide nearly all of you to crushing disappointment.

86 shares on Instagram this month:

If your store’s bowl of water is just for pets, you should really put up a sign.

80 shares on Snapchat this month:

You lose some, you lose some more.

17 shares on Twitch this month:

My teen believed the washing machine when it said it only had one minute left, and oh, how I laughed and laughed.

28 shares on Reddit this month:

I think God was high when he made me.

33 shares on Reddit this month:

Toothache and heartache comes from the same thing, which is something sweet.

42 shares on Discord this month:

I hate interviewing. Just hire me. I stand on business, for real.

90 shares on WeChat this month:

Incredibly annoying that exercising, eating right, and drinking water can make you actually feel good.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

“I asked ChatGPT.” Okay, well, I asked Jesus Christ of Nazareth.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Made the mistake of believing what I was told again.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

No thank you, I only like men who have no interest in me.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

The main function of the little toe on your foot is to make sure that all the objects and furniture in the house are in the correct place.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Why do you assume it’s invalid to “make stuff up” during an argument? It shows initiative and creativity.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I like to keep my wife guessing by walking around the backyard carrying a ladder and a chainsaw.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I should’ve been a crow. They get to fly around looking goth as hell and seeking retribution. Instead, I have to go to an office and work on my ‘people skills.’

23 folks are currently checking 👀

A poorly timed two-factor authentication request will be the thing that finally kills me.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

A fun wedding bit is to sit next to a random guest, point to the bride or groom & whisper, “it should’ve been you”

14 folks are currently checking 👀

They are mad because you took that knife out of your back and used it to cut ties.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,324

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

Sorry I missed your call when I pressed decline.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

Feelings are like children. You don’t want them driving the car, but you shouldn’t stuff them in the trunk either.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

Never faked an orgasm before, but the joy of ugly presents.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

I was gonna brush up against you like a cat, but whatever, bro.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

A chocolate advent calendar is a test of restraint that I simply do not have.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

Sorry, I can’t today. I have to sit in my room and make matters worse.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

I threw a ball for my dog. May be a little extravagant, but he looks great in a tux.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

Anyone who thinks office jobs are harmless has never cut their finger on paper.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

If we’re walking together, just know I’ll definitely bump into you because I can’t walk in a straight line.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

A collective orgasm would fix the world.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Telegram:

Imagine if spiders giggled when they ran away from us.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Aging isn’t even 1% as scary as whatever is going on with the people trying not to.

Just shared via Facebook:

I lied, there’s no sex. Can you tell me a bedtime story?

Just shared via Twitch:

As a Dad, you always want your kids to be prepared for real life, that’s why trolling them is so vital.

Making waves on Pinterest:

She was rare, like a shopping cart at the grocery without a wobbly wheel.

Making waves on TikTok:

At the art museum walking slower and observing more than anyone else.

Trending via TikTok:

My whole life, I never read a warning label telling me not to eat laundry detergent or put glue in my hair, somehow I just knew.

Trending via WeChat:

When people give me directions and they’re like “you can’t miss it,” I’m like, “Oh, you do not know what I’m capable of.”

Spotted on X:

McDonald’s will “anything else” you to death. Can you wait a McMinute?

Going viral on Reddit:

Spoiler alert: Monday doesn’t care about your feelings.

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