16 funny pen quotes - Wordgag

My bank assures me my money is safe with them, yet they keep their pens chained to desks and most of them are missing.

May 23, 2026

I don’t know who is writing my story, but they got to throw in a win somewhere or put the pen down. I need a break.

May 21, 2026

He was clicking his pen 137 times a minute, Your Honor.

May 21, 2026

That pen in the junk drawer that hasn’t been used in four years picked today to have an attitude.

May 20, 2026

I hate when I lose things at work, like pens, papers, sanity and dreams.

May 20, 2026

My handwriting got like five different fonts, depends on my mood and the pen I’m using.

May 19, 2026

I don’t get why banks tie pens with strings. We trust them with money, but they can’t trust us with a single pen.

May 19, 2026

Prison pen pal doesn’t want us to write each other anymore. Finds my life too depressing.

Apr 1, 2026

I hate when I lose things at work, like my favorite pen or my will to live.

Mar 31, 2026

Part of getting older is having a favorite pen.

Mar 30, 2026

Some people don’t have a permanent handwriting. It depends on their mood and the pen they use.

Mar 29, 2026

When your parents are on a call and they ask for a pen, man, that pressure is real.

Mar 29, 2026

My Facebook friends are like my pen collection. I have 100 but only one writes.

Mar 28, 2026

That awkward moment when someone gets angry at you for clicking a pen, but you have to click it one more time to use it.

Mar 28, 2026

A hacker called me and said he had all my passwords. I got a pen and paper and said ‘Thank God for that, what are they?’

Mar 27, 2026

Everyone’s gangster until they use a pen that is satisfyingly smooth and fun to write with.

Mar 27, 2026