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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

We got our carpet cleaned today, so I’m just waiting for the dog to throw up.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

Taking a sip of beer and letting out a big “ahhhh” so the pregnant lady at the pool next to me knows what she’s missing.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

In case of a disaster, women and children are being evacuated first so men can think about a solution in peace.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

Training a cat is very easy. After a few days, you do what she wants.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

I’m so toxic, I can fight for a relationship I don’t even want.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has copied:

David Attenborough narrating my life: “He’s still sleeping.”

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

Getting my next boyfriend a flip phone. He doesn’t need anything more.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

A swear jar for Twitter would end world hunger.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

The umbrella was going to be called brella, but the inventor hesitated.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

I’m not really a “glass half full” kind of person. I’m more of a “Where’d I put my glass?” kind of person.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2394 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,556

Funny Quotes Topics

15,236

Funny Quotes Images

12,556

Updated

15 minutes ago

Users Online

3,439

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Opening a Star Wars pub called Bar Bar Binks.

Going viral on Instagram:

If at first you don’t succeed then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.

Trending via Reddit:

I am at the age where I question throwing away a box because, “It’s a really nice box.”

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Depression is embarrassing because sometimes it makes you miss appointments and not return phone calls, and when the fog starts to lift, you gotta do a whole bloody apology tour.

Spotted on Instagram:

There’s two sides to every story, and then there’s these screenshots I got.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Throwing “whereupon” into a few work emails today to keep it fun.

Just shared via Discord:

Trying is the first step toward failure.

Trending via Slack:

I want him in ways that are deeply deeply upsetting to modern feminism.

Seen just now on Discord:

Still can’t believe we have a federal holiday to celebrate the 1996 hit movie Independence Day.

Breaking via WeChat:

Edging my house plants by putting them next to the window when it rains.

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Funny sunbathing quotes

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2394 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,556

Funny Quotes Topics

15,236

Funny Quotes Images

12,556

Updated

15 minutes ago

Users Online

3,458

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

In an effort to demonstrate how pointless internet debates are, please prove to me that snow is real.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

Tell your dog I said woof woof.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

Without the words ‘literally’ and ‘like,’ I am nothing.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

I don’t think I’d be so scared of spiders if they had eight tiny flip flops on.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

Saying “Hmmmm” when my boss walks in so he knows I’m thinking about stuff.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

I am not responsible for what my face does when you talk.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

I cannot imagine being in high school right now. Imagine the world is eating itself alive and you’re in school.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

Yes, liquor store clerk, I do need help. But I decided to come here instead.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has bookmarked:

Remember when we used to jump out of the swings? Those knees were fresh, fresh out the box.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

I followed my heart. It led me to the fridge.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Instagram:

“Don’t shoot your gun at the hurricane” the government says. I’ll do my own research, thanks.

Live now on Facebook:

One minute you’re young and carefree. The next minute you can feel in your knee when it starts to rain.

Just shared via Discord:

King-sized beds: Because you both want to sleep on the same mattress, but not in the same zip code.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I like the concept of restaurant appetizers: “Bring me something to eat. And bring me something else to eat while I’m waiting.”

Just landed via Facebook:

My hobbies include adding things to my cart, and never buying them.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Just a little reminder to laugh as much as you can, stay hydrated, and don’t let shitty people kill your vibe.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here hating myself more.

Seen just now on Slack:

It’s been a pleasure miscommunicating with you.

Spotted on Snapchat:

My so-called “friends” have asked that I stop referring to them that way.

Going viral on Slack:

You can’t hurt me. You’re not how I look first thing in the morning.

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