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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

Sorry to any bands who see me yawn during their show. It’s not you, it’s just past 10pm.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

I’m just a girl standing in front of a cat who followed me to the bathroom.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Just because the deodorant says 48 hours, it does not mean you have to challenge it.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

Friendly reminder that double negatives are a big no-no.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

Watching “Dirty Dancing” as a teenager: Damn right, no one puts Baby in a corner. Watching “Dirty Dancing” as an adult: This girl is a brat and needs a lesson.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Love it when my brain is like, “You forgot something,” and then refuses to elaborate.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

Experts say that human interaction is important for brain health but I’m willing to risk it.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

Spider-Man, but set in rural England so he just has to walk everywhere.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

Tiime isn’t on my side, it’s on my face, wrinkling my forehead.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

I can’t tell if I need coffee, a hug, or to just go live in the woods forever.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,552

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

$20k in my bank account. – The k is silent.

Going viral on Messenger:

Inflation is actually a good thing, it means money is going viral.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Just caught a moth and sent it back outside. Feeling like Mr. Miyagi.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Girl dinner, but it’s the hearts of men who wouldn’t take ‘no’ for an answer.

Just landed via Slack:

My plans for today? Same as always, drink coffee and be sexy.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Yes, I’m full of microplastics, but it’s actually been helpful. It’s given me superpowers. I can communicate with Tupperware.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

100% of all babіes are unemployed. Pathetіc.

Going viral on Reddit:

All the clouds have come out to play today.

Freshly posted on Threads:

People tell introverts to talk more and get out of their comfort zone, but no one tells extroverts to shut up to make the zone comfortable.

Just landed via Threads:

I’ve had 50 birthdays in a row without being arrested, which I’d say is an impressive streak!

12 Funny sweater quotes

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✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

51 shares on WeChat this month:

The only thing limiting what you can put in a sandwich is your imagination and the laws of physics.

68 shares on Telegram this month:

I used to work at McDonald’s and we only told ugly people that the ice cream machine was broken. So I have bad news if you were ever denied ice cream.

38 shares on WeChat this month:

Getting older is so fun. Your life goals slowly transition from things like ‘land a dream job’ to ‘successfully grow a cherry tomato.’

72 shares on YouTube this month:

A couple of birds are outside fighting. Wait. They’ve quieted down. There’s a third bird. I think he may be their therapist.

49 shares on Twitch this month:

The worst thing is finding out the “sweet guy” is just a lustful loser.

43 shares on YouTube this month:

Prepare your kids for social media by putting their artwork on the fridge and writing a bunch of mean comments under it.

33 shares on YouTube this month:

Well, it took several decades, but I might have finally run out of things to say.

68 shares on TikTok this month:

Being a people pleaser that no one is pleased with is the main cause of my anxiety.

30 shares on Telegram this month:

Age is just a number… that now takes a really long time to scroll to.

75 shares on Instagram this month:

Who called them sea lions and not soggy doggies?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

You know you’re getting old when you get mad at some random car parked outside your house.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Restaurants: put your phone down, live in the moment. Also, scan our QR code and browse our menu.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

No one is more hated than those two people who start a standing ovation.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Your phone is a casino designed to steal your time.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve officially reached the age where I don’t want to do anything after 9pm.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

When I die and y’all go through my search history, you’ll be disappointed to find mostly just definitions for very common words that I wasn’t sure I was using correctly.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

When I gain weight, I should get to designate where on my body it goes.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Due to unfortunate circumstances, things are no longer fergalicious nor bootylicious.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Adults chasing the popularity they missed out on as teenagers are the worst.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

The art of today’s art is to persuade people that it’s art.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,495

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

Lost my Thesaurus. Gutted. Really gutted. Like absolutely gutted.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

November is for turtlenecks and depression.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

I was 21 when I was 15, that’s why everything’s boring now.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

I’m ugly but I can make u laugh.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

I can relate to America, because I too am about to enter a depression.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Can someone please help me, I’m still at the Fyre Festival.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

I love when toddlers passionately talk to you about absolutely nothing.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

Don’t even bother contacting me on the Ouija Board after I die. I barely answer my texts now.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

Do you all introverts ever open a text and think, ‘I’ll reply when I have the energy,’ and then it’s three weeks, and you have to live with the guilt of being a horrible friend.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

January: the Monday of months.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Twitch:

All our dogs think we quit our jobs to spend more time with them. All our cats think we got fired for being lazy.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

I hate it when I go to the kitchen for food and only find ingredients.

Just shared via Pinterest:

She asked to see where the magic happens, so I showed her my sandwich maker.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

All billionaires must submit a list of five things they did for society in the last week or their wealth shall be confiscated.

Just shared via Instagram:

I love when I can smell my perfume on myself, like damn girl, you smell delicious.

Live now on YouTube:

I like to begin every day by looking forward to the end of the day.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Better to be a wolf that everyone hates, than a donkey that everyone rides.

Just shared via Threads:

Not texting back is only ok when I do it.

Trending via Pinterest:

This could have been an email. Me, while attending a wedding ceremony.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Answering your cell when you don’t recognize the number is like picking up a hitchhiker.

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