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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

I concern myself with the opinions of sheep because they are cute.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

I wish I loved exercise as much as I love napping 3 times a day and eating 5 times the suggested serving size.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

I could put my keys in the same spot every day, but why deprive myself of a treasure hunt that makes me late.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

My parents often told me I would lose my own head if it wasn’t screwed on and now that I’m an adult, I want to know what tools I need to have it screwed off.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

Today I went for a walk with a girl, she noticed me, so we went for a run.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

There are two classes of travel: first class and with children.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

Next time you think I am flirting with you, ask yourself if kindness is so rare in your life that you mistake it for desire.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

If I were God, I’d tell everyone that I created the animals and that I don’t know what happened after that.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

Oh, I’m so excited to wear Uggs, beanies, and oversized sweaters. I can feel fall creeping up.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

My super talent is hitting every red light on the way to wherever the hell I’m going.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,245

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via LinkedIn:

One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re searching “Thanksgiving recipes that won’t cause heartburn.”

Shared recently on Twitch:

Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.

Shared recently on Threads:

Don’t ever let a recipe tell you how much cheese you need to add, everyone knows cheese is measured with the heart.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Don’t judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect.

Freshly posted on X:

I don’t see why walking is healthy. Zombies walk constantly and they look awful.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

It’s scary when the washing machine spins really fast.

Live now on Instagram:

Grok, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

Making waves on Telegram:

Fifteen years ago, makeup was all powders and dusts. But now, it’s all goo and liquid. From this, I can infer that by 2040, it will all be made of pigmented gases.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Nurse: “This may hurt.” Me: “My life hasn’t been much fun either.”

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Reincarnation, in this economy?

Funny travel hack quotes

New funny travel hack quotes 👇

My husband told me that he used my sock trick on a recent trip, so he wouldn’t lose any. Reader, my “sock trick” is rolling matching pairs together.

14 hours ago

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All funny travel hack quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

63 shares on Reddit this month:

Life would be so much simpler if you could just smack the stupid out of people instead having to reason with them.

22 shares on Discord this month:

The part where the music beat is going from your left ear to the right at different intervals.

84 shares on Messenger this month:

Remember when we used to jump out of the swings? Those knees were fresh, fresh out the box.

14 shares on Snapchat this month:

I made coffee and carried it to the couch. I’ve done everything I had planned for this Sunday.

84 shares on Snapchat this month:

Your odds are greater of being killed by a coconut rather than a shark and this is exactly why I don’t swim in coconut-infested waters.

47 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The gossip in my town is faster than the Wi-Fi.

90 shares on TikTok this month:

Don’t hate me because I can fall asleep within seconds; hate me because I can sleep through the night without having to get up to go to the bathroom.

29 shares on Threads this month:

Last year I had no valentine, this year I also have no valentine. Consistency!

16 shares on Facebook this month:

When the job market is so bad that you’re going to follow your dreams instead.

99 shares on X this month:

The worst part of coming out of a hyperfixation is sobering up and looking at all the merch you bought that you didn’t need.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

It’s ok to not have a Valentine on Valentine’s Day. I didn’t have a groundhog on Groundhog’s Day.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

I make her eyes roll back. Not in bed though. I’m just annoying.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

My bed is from Ikea, so it’s more unstable than i am.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

Oh, gross. I didn’t know there was protein in this powder. I was only drinking it for the lead.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

Dear ghosts, if you can move stuff around and flicker lights, then you can use a mop.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

My life coach told me I didn’t make the team.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

D was probably like “lmao ok” when they named the alphabet the ABCs

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

Who needs an alarm clock when you have a bladder.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

Yes, my sex drive is higher than my will to live, and what about it?

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

No, I am not refreshed from my long weekend. I was reminded that I am not meant to work, but I am trapped in The Machine.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Apple, who gives you permission to turn the brightness down again when I’ve just turned it up?

Shared recently on Reddit:

The local casino is hosting a speed dating event. Just what every woman needs, a new boyfriend with a gambling problem.

Going viral on WeChat:

Not going is the new leaving early.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Sometimes I think about starting a podcast and then I remember all I do during conversations is nod.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

Trending via Threads:

At this point, if you buy Tesla, everyone is just going to assume you are a loser.

Shared recently on X:

Wake up, the thinking isn’t going to overthink itself.

Just shared via Messenger:

That very depressing moment when you find out the fire alarm that went off at work was just a test.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I wish anxiety came with french fries.

Shared recently on X:

Social media is mental suicide.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny travel hack quotes

New funny travel hack quotes 👇

My husband told me that he used my sock trick on a recent trip, so he wouldn’t lose any. Reader, my “sock trick” is rolling matching pairs together.

All funny travel hack quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨