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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

Don’t buy roses for her, buy chicken nuggets. Show her you really care.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

There are advantages to living alone: everything always stays where you put it. There are disadvantages to living alone: everything always stays where you put it.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

I like smoke and lightning, your honor, heavy metal thunder, racing with the wind. You know that feeling I am under.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

How are they running out of oxygen if they’re breathing it right back into the submarine?

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

UK rappers be like “I’ve got a posh flat and my bird is very comely, I own more motors than the marchioness of cholmondeley”

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Fake laughing at work is mentally exhausting. Please just leave me alone.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

I hate it when I imagine how a conversation will go and then in the actual conversation the person goes off script. That’s not your line, man.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

Toys R Us went out of business because their mascot was a stupid giraffe when it could’ve been a toy dinosaur called the Toysaurus. It was right there man.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

A good substitute for love and and personal fulfillment is a big bowl of fries.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has copied:

Having Christmas off in the middle of the work week and then forcing us to go back to work the next day feels so illegal.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,315

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Twitch:

No, I mean, it’s great toast. I just didn’t expect it to be French.

Shared recently on Discord:

Date idea: We watch Breaking Bad and break your bed.

Making waves on Twitch:

There are people who know when to reply all and when not to reply all, and none of them work at your company.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

You know those couples who share their food? I mean, what kind of people are they? Aren’t they hungry?

Spotted on YouTube:

I’m so old, I used to cry as a child because I fell off my skateboard or bike, not because I didn’t have wifi.

Shared recently on TikTok:

I’m not a very good poker player cause my eyes turn into big dollar signs when I see that I have a good hand.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

They should invent a situationship that turns into something beautiful.

Just landed via X:

Kinda miss when crushes were butterflies instead of complex emotional calculations about compatibility and red flags.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Fasted for 72 hours and gained the ability to whisper to bats.

Trending via Snapchat:

“I’m great at saving money, as long as I don’t go anywhere, see anyone, or open my eyes.”

Funny udder quotes

New funny udder quotes 👇

Milking stools only have three legs, because the cow has the udder.

2 weeks ago

cow, humor, joke, legs, stool, three, three legs, udder

All funny udder quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

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Social Media Stars ⭐

28 shares on Facebook this month:

A designated hitter in baseball is the one who has to hit for everyone in case the team is drunk.

53 shares on Twitch this month:

A selfie only a mother could like.

12 shares on Instagram this month:

A thing I never realized about being an adult is that you will always be cleaning your kitchen. No matter if you get takeout, no matter if you’re gone all day, you will be cleaning the kitchen.

10 shares on Pinterest this month:

Had a king sized bed all to myself last night. Must be what Rose felt like on that door.

99 shares on Reddit this month:

“Are you free tomorrow?” No, tomorrow I’m still expensive.

49 shares on Threads this month:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but your clothes are still in the washing machine.

56 shares on Telegram this month:

Fruit and vegetables expire faster when you’re the one paying for them.

99 shares on Snapchat this month:

My dog is quite vain. Whenever the doorbell rings, he thinks it’s for him.

87 shares on TikTok this month:

A penguin is a bird the way a hot dog is a sandwich.

46 shares on Slack this month:

On the surface: cool as a cucumber. On the inside: squirrel in traffic.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

Warning: People who need to leave their homes today are advised that it is extremely Monday outside this morning.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

I never sit around waiting for anyone except for the pizza delivery guy.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

When life closes a door, just open it again. It’s a door, that’s how they work.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

Your call is very important to us, here’s six days of irritating music.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

I’m the kind of crazy you weren’t warned about because no one knew this level existed.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has downloaded:

Some people’s high horses are actually donkeys.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

I mostly stopped responding to emails three years ago, and aside from various consequences, it’s been fine.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

Hey there, Delilah, what’s it like in new orc city?

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

Fleetwood Mac said that I could go my own way, your honor.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

And is your “sparkling personality” in the room with us now?

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via X:

Taylor Swift’s prenup is about to be longer than any book Travis Kelce has ever read.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Being insane should at least burn calories.

Live now on Instagram:

Every morning, the cat watches me make coffee and asks if we can go sit out on the balcony to watch the birds, and every morning I say, yes, of course, let’s.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Introverts have fun, too — we just don’t care if you know.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Distance is my jam; solitude is my peanut butter.

Just shared via WeChat:

Thank you for your password, now we are going to text you another password, then put that one in. Click ‘remember this computer’ so we can forget it.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Nobody gives me butterflies anymore. Y’all just give me brain damage.

Making waves on Slack:

Rare earth, this rare earth, that. There’s nothing more rare on this earth than affordable housing in a walkable neighborhood.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

My apologies to your congregation. I totally misunderstood when you asked for missionary volunteers.

Going bananas on Facebook:

Going out on Friday night will always be better than going out on a Saturday night.

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Funny udder quotes

New funny udder quotes 👇

Milking stools only have three legs, because the cow has the udder.

All funny udder quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨