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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

But babe, that’s my emotional support Lord of the Rings Extended Edition.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

Definitely thought I’d be solving mysteries and unmasking ghosts in a van with a dog by this point in my life.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

Me: “I’m still young.” My bones: “No, we not.”

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

I need to consult the woods about this.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

At my age, this “microsleep” can sometimes last hours.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

I’m busy watching the vegan couple next door arguing about the Big Mac wrapper I hid in their trash can.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

When you try to be humble and say it’s no big deal and they agree with you.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

Yes, my date did get up and leave during dinner, but luckily she hadn’t finished her food.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

Hanging out with your parents as an adult is so interesting, cause it’s like, “Oh, so that’s why I’m like this.”

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

I don’t know about you guys, but when I have to make a decision I analyze the situation, evaluate the risk, take measures to limit the consequences and then I completely screw up.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

769 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,931

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,931

Updated

22 minutes ago

Users Online

3,443

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Slack:

When I say I’m Christmas shopping the “for myself” is silent.

Going viral on Instagram:

Jury duty is a wild concept. Whenever the government wants, they can just be like “Call off work, bestie, we need you to solve a murder. Here’s fifteen dollars.”

Just shared via TikTok:

Want to know what someone is really like? Play Monopoly with them.

Shared recently on X:

Okay, I’ve proved I’m not a robot, now you prove you’re not a human.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

I got us matching straight jackets for Christmas.

Just landed via Twitch:

A haunted house, but it’s just a room full of people asking you to tell them a fun fact about yourself.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Mad that so many renaissance artists were named after ninja turtles.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I just want what every middle-aged person wants: to remember what it was that I wanted.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Can’t stand British posts on my timeline. “I bought this for four squids and a halfpenny!” What the hell are you talking about?

Spotted on Twitch:

My Saturday was going pretty well until I realized it was Sunday.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

769 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,931

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,931

Updated

22 minutes ago

Users Online

3,436

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

I once let a really short guy be the big spoon and it felt like I went to bed with a backpack on.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

You give my middle finger an erection.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

I went downstairs to get my charger. I came back up with a bowl of ice cream and no charger.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

So why is it that when Star Trek ‘boldly go where no one has gone before’ they always find someone there?

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

If you’re going to be weird, be confident about it.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

As I’m cleaning my room, this is a friendly reminder that you actually don’t need that free t-shirt or tote bag from that event.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

The guy in the stall beside doesn’t know he can shut off his camera shutter.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

Losing weight in your 40’s: LOL!

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

The only squat I’m even considering doing today is diddly.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

If reports from this daisy are accurate, she loves me not.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Snapchat:

I hate it when someone gives me a valid solution to my problem and I have to find something new to complain about.

Going viral on Slack:

My goal for this year is just to make sure the aliens know I’m on their side.

Seen just now on Twitch:

I am cassette tape years old.

Trending via YouTube:

Life is so exciting. I was in my bedroom and now I’m in the living room. Who knows where I’ll go next.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Don’t let anyone treat you like pond water. You are Fiji water, okay?

Live now on Instagram:

Your secret is safe with me because I don’t care.

Going viral on WeChat:

Spotify Wrapped, but for all your bad decisions this year.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I have read that there are imaginary pregnancies. The belly gets bigger and bigger, but there is no baby inside. Finally a diagnosis.

Shared recently on X:

I get most of my exercise these days from shaking my head in disbelief.

Just landed via Slack:

Sorry for what I said when I was drunk. I meant every word.

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