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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

I miss when bills were none of my business.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

Always be kind. You never know who might own a jacuzzi.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

The first time I heard “big naturals,” I thought it referred to major outdoor landmarks such as the Grand Canyon or the Great Barrier Reef.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

Note to self: No more bitching about ugly furniture with people at IKEA whose home you haven’t been to yet.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

Your pronouns should be get/help.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

Yeah, sex is cool, but have you ever crawled out of the worst depression of your life and got your spark back?

Someone from 🇺🇦 has copied:

Since I’ve stayed away from most people, I get on much better with people.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

NFTs were less about the money and more about the friends you scammed along the way.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

Body by sandwich.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Rock bottom should give me free sandwich and coffee for how often I hit it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2382 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,544

Funny Quotes Topics

15,225

Funny Quotes Images

12,544

14 hours ago

3,458

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Discord:

My life is ruined. I wish to live no more. Never mind, I found the remote.

Just shared via Threads:

Sometimes I think about starting a podcast and then I remember all I do during conversations is nod.

Just landed via Discord:

Why are conclusions necessary in essays? Were you not following?

Shared recently on Threads:

Nothing is impossible, except for my daughter returning home with the hat and gloves she wore to school this morning.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

I wish it was socially acceptable to DM someone, “Hey, why did you and your partner break up?”

Freshly posted on X:

Couples who finish each other’s sentences have killed before and will kill again.

Just landed via Discord:

If there was an award for staying at home, I’d win and then send someone else to pick it up for me.

Spotted on X:

I still can’t believe Aldi sells shopping carts for 25 cents. I’ve got 8 of them now and don’t really even have a use for them, it was just too good of a deal to pass up.

Live now on Telegram:

That awkward moment your mom is doing the dishes and you slowly put your dish in the sink.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Commenting “what about us?” on all Valentine pics this year.

Funny that the Three Wise Men brought probably the three worst presents for a newborn baby.

6 months ago

Funny that the Three Wise Men brought probably the three worst presents for a newborn baby.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Seems like the Three Wise Men were a bit confused on the concept of practical baby gifts 🤔🎁 I mean, gold, frankincense, and myrrh are nice and all, but can you imagine a baby trying to play with that? 😂 Maybe next time they should team up with Santa for some more baby-friendly goodies! 🎅👶 #BabyGiftBlunder

baby, gifts, humor, irony, men, newborn, presents, three, Three Wise Men, wise, worst

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2382 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,544

Funny Quotes Topics

15,225

Funny Quotes Images

12,544

14 hours ago

3,442

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

Once I shot a man with a paintball gun, just to watch him dye.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

When is someone actually going to change the surprise in the avocado? This hard core is kind of a stupid toy.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

Oh, I have Christmas spirit. The question is: Do I mix it with coke or do I drink it neat?

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

That depressing moment when you pull up to work and the building is not engulfed in flames.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

Imagine if you spent all your time studying, actually studying.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

You know what’s worse than someone’s phone alarm playing the tune over and over? Someone else who starts whistling along.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

Facial recognition technology, but for me when I’m talking to people I’ve apparently met before.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

Handle every stressful situation like a dog. If you can’t eat or play with it, just pee on it and walk away.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

I miss the good ol’ days until I remember things like having to get out of my chair and smack the TV to get a clearer picture.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

“I thought it might be nice to go round the room and say a bit about ourselves.” Oh dear, you thought wrong.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Slack:

American Feng Shui is when the grill doesn’t wobble.

Breaking via Reddit:

I’ve never seen anything sadder than me in a black cape under the salon lights with wet hair parted incorrectly by a solid inch.

Going viral on WeChat:

More foods should have boats, why should gravy have all the fun?

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

I’m only here to test your patience, but like, in a sexy way.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Thanks for your email! Unfortunately, I have filled my pockets with stones and am making my way to the sea.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I don’t want to do exercise, but I want to have done exercise.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Telling an introvert to go to a party is like telling a saint to go to Hell.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

If you’re feeling a little uneasy about the state of global geopolitics, remember to spend as much time on your phone as possible. The more information you ingest as you scroll, the calmer you will become.

Live now on X:

I believe in you. I also believe in Bigfoot so don’t get too excited.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I refuse to be bound by the social construct called “the calendar.” Merry Christmas, everyone.

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