Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I put my pants on just like everybody else: when the police tell me to.
  • I prefer to use deodorant immediately after shaving my armpits so that I can feel that I’m still alive.
  • You know what goes great with helping your kid with math homework? Vodka!
  • Phone addiction got so bad that watching a movie feels productive.
  • According to my calculations, we’re all screwed.
  • The fewer friends at your birthday party means more cake for you. Follow me for more life hacks.