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Commentary:
"Oh, the anticipation of a mother's kitchen scrutiny! 🤣🍴 It's like a rite of passage, right? Who else is eagerly awaiting the inevitable rearrangement of kitchen cupboards and drawers? 🙋‍♂️ #MomKnowsBest #KitchenMakeover"

advice, expectations, family, house, i, kitchen, me, mom, new, organize, tell, wait, wrong

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We went on a family vacation and it was a terrible experience. It was all whining, complaining, and tantrums. And don’t get me started on what my kids did.

1 month ago
complaining, experience, family, family vacation, kids, me, tantrum, terrible, terrible experience, vacation, whining
They say money doesn’t solve all problems, but it will surely solve all of mine.

1 month ago
humor, money, problems, sarcasm, solve, wealth
Behold the majestic elephant in its natural habitat, the room.

2 weeks ago
animal, awkward, awkward situation, elephant, funny observation, humor, joke, metaphor, natural, observation, room, situation
My kids act like they’re afraid of monsters, when they are literally the most terrifying creatures I’ve ever met.

1 month ago
act, afraid, childhood, creatures, ever, family, humor, kids, monsters, parenting, terrifying
I love having plans to cancel.

5 months ago
cancel, cancellation, having, humor, i, introvert, life, love, plan, plans, social, social life
“Angry on the internet” is such an unfortunate personality.

2 weeks ago
anger, angry, behavior, humor, internet, online, online behavior, personality, unfortunate

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

If you think I’m rude, you should hear the voices in my head.

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People who grew up with money will look you in the eyes and ask you something insane like, “Do you ski?”

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My youngest had a mandatory drugs and alcohol lecture today at school, and he still can’t mix a proper drink.

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My favorite 90s skill: Uninstalling my car stereo and hiding it in my glove box in under 15 seconds.

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I hate having a body, it’s so high maintenance. Shower this, eat that, drink this, sleep that, it’s all very stupid.

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Whenever someone tells me how well behaved my kids are, I say it’s cause they’re not at home.

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Was complaining to my mom about my daughter’s attitude and she told me I should’ve named her payback.

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Breaking via Snapchat:

This too shall pass… It may pass like a kidney stone, but it will pass.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I woke up alive again.

Spotted on Twitch:

If two witches watched two watches, which witch would watch which watch? Each witch would watch which watch belonged to which witch’s wrist.

Spreading quickly via X:

My favorite yoga pose is the one where you eat a sandwich.

Going bananas on Discord:

Welcome to your 40s, where the hair shows up uninvited and looks pissed to be here.

Shared recently on Threads:

My secret talent is turning any situation into a considerably more awkward one.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Walking around the art museum and verbally saying, “Banger,” after inspecting a painting.

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I can’t wait for my mom to come to my new house so she can tell me how I organized the kitchen wrong.

We went on a family vacation and it was a terrible experience. It was all whining, complaining, and tantrums. And don’t get me started on what my kids did.

They say money doesn’t solve all problems, but it will surely solve all of mine.

Behold the majestic elephant in its natural habitat, the room.

My kids act like they’re afraid of monsters, when they are literally the most terrifying creatures I’ve ever met.

“Angry on the internet” is such an unfortunate personality.

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My biggest sexual fantasy is someone throwing a million dollars on my naked body and then leaving me alone.

I don’t think inside the box and I don’t think outside the box. I don’t even know where the box is.

I applied for a job and got it, and now I really have to go there. Crap!

Me, gently telling my kids that I ate the rest of the ice cream: Your dad ate the rest of the ice cream.

What if AirPods had tongues and they started licking the inside of your ears to indicate they’re low on battery?

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My red flag is that I don’t make playlists on Spotify. I just add every song I’ve ever liked to the ‘Liked Songs’ playlist and shuffle that, like an iPod.

Alexa, take responsibility for my actions.

The minute I start feeling like a mother to a man, the relationship is over.

That Coldplay CEO guy was held more accountable than the president.

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It’s exciting to receive a Valentine’s Day card and not know who it’s from. A Father’s Day card, not so much.

Damn girl, are you a plate of microwaved leftovers? Because you’re hot on the outside and cold on the inside.

Women only want one thing, and it’s the power to cast men who tell us to smile right into a pit of giant venomous serpents.

I stopped experimenting in bed after the great honey disaster of 2015.

The difference between the kids table and the adults table during holiday dinners is that there is much more screaming, crying, and arguing at the adults table.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Dear people, who drive without music playing, what do you do with your brain?

Is ice cream for dinner a thing, because ice cream for dinner should be be a thing.

Not to brag, but what a time to be childless.

He’s an everything bagel… I’m just a nothing burger…

Having to pee really puts things into perspective. Like, OK, none of this matters.

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I can’t wait for my mom to come to my new house so she can tell me how I organized the kitchen wrong.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

We went on a family vacation and it was a terrible experience. It was all whining, complaining, and tantrums. And don’t get me started on what my kids did.

They say money doesn’t solve all problems, but it will surely solve all of mine.

Behold the majestic elephant in its natural habitat, the room.

My kids act like they’re afraid of monsters, when they are literally the most terrifying creatures I’ve ever met.

I love having plans to cancel.

“Angry on the internet” is such an unfortunate personality.

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