Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Only mosquitoes find me attractive. Nobody else.
  • I used to blame all my problems on my parents, but now that I’m a grown up, I have come to terms with the fact that when bad things happen to me, it’s probably just that Mercury’s in retrograde again.
  • I have been nothing but creepy and aggressive to you. Please respond.
  • If you’ve never had a cheeseburger change your mood, you’ve never had a cheeseburger.
  • I wonder if Van Halen realized they were writing music just to lift weights to.
  • Really wanted to be a therapist until I read some of your guys’ posts and problems, and I want nothing to do with that mess.