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Commentary:
"Flies 🪰- nature's tiny villains, always up to no good! 🦟 They think they're so sly with their hand-rubbing tactics, but they can't outsmart a simple open window. 😂 Maybe they're just trying to start a fly uprising? 🤔 Watch out, world, the flies are coming for us!"

annoyance, disgusting, even, fly, hands, hate, humor, i, insect, little, open, plotting, rub, together, window

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Not to brag, but I ate all of my bananas before they turned brown. Don’t be jealous.

1 month ago
bananas, before, brag, bragging, brown, eating, fruit, healthy, healthy snack, humor, i, jealous, jealousy, self-confidence, snack, turned
May the hardest part of your day be getting the jeans over your butt.

3 months ago
body, butt, challenge, clothing, comfort, day, getting, hardest, humor, jeans, over
I always figure it out on my own, I just need to panic first.

1 week ago
always, anxiety, figure, humor, i, just, need, own, panic, problem, problem-solving, self-reliance, solving, stress
I prefer to use deodorant immediately after shaving my armpits so that I can feel that I’m still alive.

1 month ago
alive, armpits, care, deodorant, feel, humor, hygiene, i, personal, personal care, shaving, still
I think everyone should get $500 deposited into their accounts every day, just for waking up.

3 months ago
accounts, daily, daily deposit, day, deposit, every, everyone, finance, humor, i, just, money, payment, should, think, thinking, wake, wake up, waking, wishful, wishful thinking
Hit my coworker with “you’re a lucky man” after I saw a picture of his wife just to let him know that I want to sleep with her.

1 month ago
after, coworker, flirtation, hit, humor, i, joke, just, know, let, lucky, lucky man, man, picture, saw, sleep, want, wife, workplace

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

Nothing says entitlement like a goose family crossing the road.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

UK rappers be like “I’ve got a posh flat and my bird is very comely, I own more motors than the marchioness of cholmondeley”

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

Damn, didn’t win the lottery. It’s messing up my budget plan.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

There are days when trying to control your class is like trying to hug a tornado.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

Weirdos gonna weird.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

There is too much money in the world for me to be broke.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

I only go on LinkedIn to see what my coworkers looked like 15 years ago.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

If I’ve offended you with my posts, I humbly apologize, I honestly did not think you could read.

Just landed via X:

“Santa isn’t real!” Okay, I literally just saw him at the mall.

Going bananas on YouTube:

My teen is asking for noise-cancelling headphones like I’m going to give him the gift of ignoring me better.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Life sucks a lot less when your feet are in a creek, and you forgot your phone in the truck.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to skirt the issue.

Spotted on X:

Strangers vomiting their beliefs all over you every day is not good for the soul.

Going viral on TikTok:

You should be able to google what someone said to you at the bar last night.

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I hate when flies rub their disgusting little hands together. What could you possibly be plotting? You can’t even get out of the open window.

Not to brag, but I ate all of my bananas before they turned brown. Don’t be jealous.

May the hardest part of your day be getting the jeans over your butt.

I always figure it out on my own, I just need to panic first.

I prefer to use deodorant immediately after shaving my armpits so that I can feel that I’m still alive.

I think everyone should get $500 deposited into their accounts every day, just for waking up.

Hit my coworker with “you’re a lucky man” after I saw a picture of his wife just to let him know that I want to sleep with her.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

I have never in my life learned from another person’s mistakes, I would literally let a giant wooden horse into my house right this second.

Please no more relationships that are supposed to be a lesson. I’m already quite the scholar.

One day you said w00t for the last time, and didn’t even realize.

Maybe your baby is crying because he knows you don’t have rizz.

I’ve got 50 minutes to make it look like I’ve been flossing for the last 6 months.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Still hard to believe that access to infinite information made us dumber.

Making her wear those remote-controlled vibrating panties in public so I can inform her when I’m tired and want to leave the party.

Nothing makes me feel more powerful than when I write ‘furthermore’ in an email.

Goodbye, August, don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

They should invent weekends that are long-lasting.

Flat earth is too mainstream, hollow earth is where it’s at.

Me rereading his texts after we’ve already said goodnight just so I can giggle and blush all over again.

Can we start the weekend again? I wasn’t ready.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

In the 80s, you could literally shrink your kids with a shrink-ray, and your wife wouldn’t divorce you. I’m pretty sure I saw a documentary film about it.

Reverse cowgirl so he doesn’t see the double chin.

Just another day of not being hot and rich.

I put my pants on just like everybody else: when the police tell me to.

Washing your face and water going down your elbow is so sickening.

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I hate when flies rub their disgusting little hands together. What could you possibly be plotting? You can’t even get out of the open window.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Not to brag, but I ate all of my bananas before they turned brown. Don’t be jealous.

May the hardest part of your day be getting the jeans over your butt.

I always figure it out on my own, I just need to panic first.

I prefer to use deodorant immediately after shaving my armpits so that I can feel that I’m still alive.

I think everyone should get $500 deposited into their accounts every day, just for waking up.

Hit my coworker with “you’re a lucky man” after I saw a picture of his wife just to let him know that I want to sleep with her.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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