Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • If you don’t know how many x-rays it takes before a person develops super powers, should you really be in a medical profession?
  • I love wearing sunglasses. Am I looking at your face? Am I looking at your ass? No one knows.
  • Sick and tired of these 30 mins weekends.
  • People always tell me I’d be “late to my own funeral” like it’s a bad thing. They’d be lucky if I even showed up to that depressing shit.
  • Keep your friend’s toast and your enemy’s toaster.
  • Men be like “I would do anything for you” and then do nothing.