Wordgag ใƒ„

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฟ๐Ÿ‡ผ has bookmarked:

One time, I was so high my bra unclasped, and I thought I got shot.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ฎ has viewed:

Everyone is using AI to write business emails, texts, etc. At this point in time, we may as well just tell our AIs to talk to each other and then let us know what kind of deal they worked out.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡ฑ has bookmarked:

Itโ€™s funny how when youโ€™re at work, โ€œGo to hellโ€ comes out as โ€œNo problem.โ€

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ has copied:

You should be able to call in sad to work.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has copied:

To all the people who ask singles why they are actually single: Please don’t. We have sworn an oath and are not allowed to tell you the secret of our success.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has bookmarked:

I told all my neighbors that I have a twin, so that when I see them in public I donโ€™t have to talk to them.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has downloaded:

The ability to adjust your vocabulary based on who you’re speaking to is a valuable life skill that many people lack.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has downloaded:

Is it fall yet? I really canโ€™t suck my stomach in much longer.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡พ has shared:

Sorry I’m unavailable… the horrors of reality insist upon themselves.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has viewed:

A clever man fills his wife’s closet with so many clothes that no other man can fit in.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,604

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Going bananas on YouTube:

Dating to marry in a world filled with cheaters, situationships, and hook-up culture.

Just landed via WeChat:

Managers want a week of silence and meditation in order to be even more of a manager afterwards.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

โ€œNew password cannot be your old passwordโ€ makes me so mad.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

The eyes are the windows to the soul. A mustache is the front garden, and the mouth is that big pothole the council should do something about.

Making waves on Discord:

Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I’m doing while I’m doing it.

Trending via Facebook:

I’m sick of waking up thinking about the government, and going to bed thinking about the government.

Spotted on X:

I hear the responses my young siblings give my mom, and Iโ€™m speechless; they donโ€™t know the commando she was in her prime.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Did you know? By replacing your coffee with green tea, you can lose up to 92% of what little joy you still have left in your life.

Broadcasted on Discord:

I love saying “my man” and not his name, so when I get a new one, nobody knows.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Today, I noticed that the cover of my ironing board was wrinkled, and I laughed at the irony. Then I laughed again because of the word “irony.”

I heard God is testing both of us at the same time. Wanna hang out?

Playful quote about shared divine tests and friendship, filled with humorous camaraderie.
Download image โ†“

Commentary:
"Looks like God got tired of multitasking and thought, why not test two birds with one stone? ๐Ÿ•Š๏ธ๐Ÿชถ Bet He didn't expect us to team up and make a party out of it! ๐ŸŽ‰ Let's show Him what teamwork really looks like! ๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿ˜„"

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Keep the laugh going ๐Ÿ˜‚

Trending Funny Quotes ๐Ÿ‘‡

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Social Media Stars โญ

25 shares on Pinterest this month:

โ€œCareful. It’s slippery!โ€ – Everyone, after you’ve already slipped.

33 shares on LinkedIn this month:

To be fair, a dumpster is like one of the safest places to have a fire.

50 shares on LinkedIn this month:

There is no sex. I lied. You are gonna lay here and take personality quizzes with me.

58 shares on Messenger this month:

Hell hath no fury like a toddler getting his nose wiped.

96 shares on Facebook this month:

Caught the bouquet at the funeral.

54 shares on Slack this month:

An adult is a person that keeps Ibuprofen in more than one place.

75 shares on Pinterest this month:

Congress taking an entire month off in a country where most people donโ€™t get more than 2 weeks’ vacation is awesome.

38 shares on Slack this month:

Congrats to my tween for graduating at the top of his class from eye roll university.

54 shares on Threads this month:

My birthday wish is for everyone to ignore my birthday.

30 shares on Pinterest this month:

โ€œYou have reached your monthly article limit,โ€ – a website youโ€™ve never accessed before today.

Trending Topics ๐Ÿ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes ๐Ÿ’ฅ

24 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Actually, itโ€™s illegal to be upset if you make a date on Halloween and they ghost you.

18 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Iโ€™m just a girl looking for another snack.

19 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Wanna know what the 90โ€™s were like? Put your phone down and go outside.

15 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

By the time I remember to text back, it be too disrespectful to even do it.

6 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

One interesting thing I learned in my thirties is that you can leave a bar before it closes.

11 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Ghosting is disrespectful unless itโ€™s me doing it.

20 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

He died doing what he did best, trying to get a croc to wear a Croc.

16 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Love low-hanging fruit. Easiest kind to obtain, in my opinion.

15 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Disney set unrealistic standards of how often woodland creatures would help me clean and do laundry if I just sang out my window.

25 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

My goal in life is to not have to commit seppuku.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

calculatingโ€ฆ

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,651

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฑ has shared:

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life or are living it to the fullest.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has shared:

If you give me a serious answer to a silly question, Iโ€™m giving you a wedgie.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ญ has downloaded:

If you’re soft, don’t come to my house, cause my kids will roast you.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ซ has viewed:

When someone touches my phone, I automatically turn into a ninja.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฏ has bookmarked:

Revenge? No. I just post hot selfies and let the algorithm do God’s work.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ท has copied:

Be the elephant you wish to see in the room.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has bookmarked:

The more you weigh, the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe, Eat cake.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ท๐Ÿ‡บ has downloaded:

I want to run through your dreams and settle in your nightmares.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ฐ has bookmarked:

ADHD is when you buy a blender and then make smoothies every day for 2 weeks, and then never make one or even acknowledge your blender ever again.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฏ has copied:

If it hurts you more than it hurts them, you are holding the taser wrong.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Going viral on X:

I have been alive all my life, and have not once seen a Chinese food commercial.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

Sorry, but if youโ€™re walking slower than me on the sidewalk, youโ€™re my enemy. Walking faster than me? Also my enemy. Now if youโ€™re walking at the same speed as me… hmm, yeah, Iโ€™m thinking enemy.

Trending via Slack:

Men want to meet up too easily. What if I plan to sacrifice you?

Spotted on Pinterest:

Don’t break someone’s heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206 of them.

Live now on Reddit:

If people love cheese so much, why are they mad when someone smells like cheese.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Did you know there are people who go away for 3 days and only pack 3 daysโ€™ worth of clothing?

Making waves on Threads:

I taught my kids about democracy tonight by having them vote on which movie to watch and pizza to order. I then picked the movie and pizza because I’m the one with the money.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

I need a vacation, but the kind where everyone else leaves, and I have my house to myself for a few days.

Going viral on YouTube:

Iโ€™m going to write a book about all the things I should have done with my life. lโ€™ll call it my oughtabiography.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Cannabis has many benefits. For example, it makes you retarded. But in addition, it also makes you lazy. No worries though, it also makes you fat and insane.

ยฉ 2026. All rights reserved.

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