Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
🎨 "Who knew hanging paintings could be so scandalous? Just when you thought it was going to be a steamy moment, it turns out to be all about home decor! Talk about a plot twist! 🖼️😅"

art, hang, humor, lie, painting, relationship, sex, straight, tell

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Hi, I’m online. Would you like to argue for an hour about whether a hotdog is a sandwich?

0

5 days ago

argue, argument, conversation, debate, food, food debate, hi, hotdog, hour, humor, online, sandwich
Biting your tongue while eating is a perfect example of how you can still screw up, even with decades of experience.

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2 months ago

biting, decades, eating, even, example, experience, humor, lesson, life, life lesson, mistake, perfect, screw, screw up, still, tongue, tongue biting, while
The adjective for metal is metallic, but not so for iron, which is ironic.

0

2 months ago

adjective, humor, iron, ironic, language, metal, metallic, pun, wordplay
The lion does not concern himself with Microsoft Teams.

0

2 months ago

communication, concern, distraction, humor, joke, lion, microsoft, Microsoft Teams, office, productivity, Teams, workplace
People call me a “Trekkie,” but I’m not. I’ve only seen Star Wars a couple of times.

0

2 months ago

call, couple, culture, fandom, geek, humor, joke, me, movie, movie reference, only, parody, people, pop, pop culture, reference, sci-fi, seen, star, Star Wars, times, Trekkie, wars
Mail is crazy because it’s like 99 pieces of straight up garbage and 1 that if you don’t reply to you’re going to jail.

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2 months ago

anxiety, communication, crazy, garbage, going, jail, letter, mail, pieces, reply, straight

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

87 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The more you embrace your crazy side, the more fun life becomes.

80 shares on Facebook this month:

I’ll see you in court (at the marriage registry) (I love you)

68 shares on Telegram this month:

I’ve already broken all my resolutions and like four commandments.

60 shares on X this month:

Always stay crazy. Otherwise you’ll go crazy.

72 shares on X this month:

Referring to my boss’s wife as my boss-in-law.

92 shares on Reddit this month:

Pretty sure I need to go back to bed and sleep for 3 days.

78 shares on Twitch this month:

I love all mythical creatures. Vampires, werewolves, unicorns, kids who listen.

87 shares on Instagram this month:

Why fall in love when you can fall asleep?

53 shares on YouTube this month:

It’s always annoying to be woken up by some guy mowing his lawn. Just go around me, man.

56 shares on Telegram this month:

You know you’re getting older when you keep asking “Why do they have to make the instructions so small?”

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

Everyone thinks they won’t be that couple that goes from ‘everything you do is a turn-on’ to ‘you’re breathing too loud,’ but they will be, oh, they will be.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

Wow, this is a really nice, sturdy box. I should keep it in the attic for the next 20 years.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

I haven’t posted a selfie in a while, but I’m still very cute. Just to keep you updated.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Remember, when a package says “sharing size”, that’s just a guideline. They have no enforcement mechanism.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

Shutting up is gluten-free. Maybe add that to your diet, princess.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

They say every snowflake is different, as if someone actually checked them.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

Fun fact: Did you know that removing junk food from your diet can help you lose up to 90% of your will to live?

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

The only appointment I’m ever on time for is disappointment.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

The best part about filling out doctor appointment forms online is when you get there and they say “hello, please fill out these forms!”

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

I think fathers lose their mind a little bit when they realize their daughters aren’t as forgiving as their wives.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Facebook:

She asked to see where the magic happens, so I showed her my sandwich maker.

Going viral on Threads:

Today, I used a wire I’ve kept in my box of cables since 2011. Please applaud.

Going viral on WeChat:

My only regret is not leaving people alone the first time they moved funny.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Pinky promises are still a legit foundation of trust.

Going viral on TikTok:

Having now listened to the entire song, I have to say there’s some obvious internal disagreement as to what the Hokey Pokey is all about.

Going bananas on TikTok:

God, please, for once in my life, let me get what I want.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Make your salad taste better by putting it between bread, meat, cheese, and Big Mac sauce.

Trending via Twitch:

I never had kids because little kids see too many ghosts and that’s something I’d rather not know about.

Making waves on Slack:

There is absolutely no excuse for laziness. But if you find one, let me know.

Making waves on YouTube:

Parents be like, “I gave you everything I had,” and by everything, they meant the collector’s edition boxed set of mental illness.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I lied, there’s no sex. Stand over there and tell me if this painting I’m hanging is straight.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Hi, I’m online. Would you like to argue for an hour about whether a hotdog is a sandwich?

Biting your tongue while eating is a perfect example of how you can still screw up, even with decades of experience.

The adjective for metal is metallic, but not so for iron, which is ironic.

The lion does not concern himself with Microsoft Teams.

People call me a “Trekkie,” but I’m not. I’ve only seen Star Wars a couple of times.

Mail is crazy because it’s like 99 pieces of straight up garbage and 1 that if you don’t reply to you’re going to jail.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨