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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ง has copied:

My teen believed the washing machine when it said it only had one minute left, and oh, how I laughed and laughed.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has shared:

If you make it through life without being portrayed in a murder documentary, take the win.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฐ has viewed:

People who lie all the time really think that we donโ€™t know.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡น has viewed:

It’s time for basic human empathy to make a comeback.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ท has bookmarked:

My New Year’s resolution is to procrastinate. I’Il start tomorrow.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has downloaded:

Never trust people who smile constantly. They’re either selling something or not very bright.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ธ has bookmarked:

If you think voting is pointless wait until you hear about writing posts here.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡พ has bookmarked:

I’m just a girl, standing in front of a Monday, asking it to be a Friday.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ช has bookmarked:

Pregnancy is crazy. You really come home with someone you donโ€™t know, with no teeth.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ญ has viewed:

Just saw someone my age running and she wasnโ€™t chasing an ice-cream truck.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

2381 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,543

Funny Quotes Topics

15,226

Funny Quotes Images

12,543

Updated

1 hour ago

Users Online

3,445

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Seen just now on Telegram:

Now I get why my grandma got up early to have a little coffee by herself.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Only thing sexier than a bad decisions is a bad decision with queso.

Making waves on Instagram:

By the way, if you don’t buy anything on Black Friday, you can save up to 100%.

Seen just now on YouTube:

When society eventually breaks down and we are left to rebuild civilization, I hope there are people who still know how to make cheese.

Shared recently on X:

I wish someone would light up the way Siri does when I say, “Hey.”

Just landed via Twitch:

What base is it when he says, โ€œI know you need it badly,โ€ but heโ€™s talking about sleep?

Live now on Pinterest:

If weโ€™re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge.

Seen just now on Discord:

Nothing you want to do has a timeline.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Isnโ€™t it weird we have a little voice in our head, like the one youโ€™re using to read this?

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Stranger: Your children are angels. Me: So was the devil.

If I was a star and you were a star, I would wink at you and blink at you and twinkle at you and the earthlings would call it science.

If I was a star and you were a star, I would wink at you and blink at you and twinkle at you and the earthlings would call it science.
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Commentary:
"Ah, a celestial love story in the making! โœจ If stars could flirt, imagine the dazzling cosmic display we'd witness! ๐ŸŒŸ The universe would definitely be shipping this stellar romance! ๐Ÿ’ซ #ScienceMeetsRomance"

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Welcome to Wordgag! ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŒ๏ธ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ฅ

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Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

2381 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,543

Funny Quotes Topics

15,226

Funny Quotes Images

12,543

Updated

1 hour ago

Users Online

3,455

Funny Quotes of the Month ๐Ÿš€

Funny Quotes of the Year โญ

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ญ has copied:

The more attention you get on this website, the less you enjoy being on it.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฟ has downloaded:

There’s something meditative about cleaning. It’s the perfect time to reflect and plan revenge on every single person who has ever wronged you.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡น has copied:

The worst thing you can do while cleaning is sit down for a minute.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ท๐Ÿ‡บ has copied:

First date idea: Couples Colonoscopies.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฌ has shared:

If anyone wants to contact me, from now on I can only be reached via my bank account.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡น has downloaded:

God created childbirth so women could know how men feel when we have a cold.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ผ๐Ÿ‡ธ has downloaded:

Long sandwiches should have suitcase handles.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ช has copied:

I like my bed more than I like most people.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ท has bookmarked:

I learned Morse code, and then I couldn’t sleep because the rain kept telling me to go fuck myself.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ท has downloaded:

I need someone to peer pressure me into doing things.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Just shared via WeChat:

Keep your temper. Nobody else wants it.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Life would be so much easier if the nose of people who lie all the time did actually grow longer like Pinocchio’s.

Reported on X:

Bands are always like โ€œhereโ€™s another songโ€. Yeah, no shit, thatโ€™s pretty much all you do.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Sorry, can’t. I’m currently nodding in class so the teacher doesn’t feel sad.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

No matter how busy my Sunday gets, I always manage to set aside time to panic about Monday.

Seen just now on Threads:

You can get addicted to a certain kind of swagness.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I donโ€™t want to alarm anyone, but my doctor says I have an irreversible terminal condition called aging.

Spotted on Reddit:

โ€œHope this email finds you doing well!โ€ The email found me, therefore I am unwell.

Making waves on TikTok:

My life goal is to make you feel as awkward or awesome as you are making me feel.

Making waves on Discord:

Threw my back out due to overwhelming sensuality again.

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