Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • If the apple really doesn’t fall far from the tree, my kids are screwed.
  • One of my biggest fears during a zombie apocalypse is having to sleep without a fan.
  • Once I shot a man with a paintball gun, just to watch him dye.
  • Not looking for a sugar daddy, but something more of a pay pal.
  • The worst part of marriage is when you do something stupid, the best part of marriage is when your partner does something stupid.
  • I’m convinced a lot of people online are communicating from prison.