Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, the fine line between love and the office! 💔💼 Talking nonsense can be a telltale sign of both – just remember to focus on the important stuff, like whether it's a date night or a board meeting! 😜 #LoveVsWork"

doing, humor, just, love, nonsense, office, relationships, talking, thinking, time, work

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The feminine urge to be the most feared witch in the village.

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3 months ago

empowerment, fear, feminine, feminine urge, humor, most, superstition, urge, village, witch
Follow your heart, but take your brain with you.

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2 months ago

advice, balance, brain, caution, decision, decision making, follow, heart, humor, making, take, wisdom
When I was a kid, I thought cicadas were the sound sunshine makes when it’s real hot outside.

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2 months ago

childhood, cicada, funny thought, heat, hot, i, kid, misconception, nature, outside, real, sound, summer, sunshine, thought
Sex in the snow is wintercourse.

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2 months ago

activity, fun, fun activity, humor, outdoor, outdoor fun, sex, snow, winter, wintercourse
I think nervous flatulence would be helpful if you were ever kidnapped.

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2 months ago

anxiety, escape, ever, flatulence, helpful, humor, i, kidnapped, nervous, situation, think
He’s an everything bagel… I’m just a nothing burger…

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4 months ago

bagel, burger, comparison, everything, everything bagel, food, food metaphor, humor, just, metaphor, nothing, nothing burger, self-deprecation

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

86 shares on YouTube this month:

My extravagant lifestyle of paying for housing and buying groceries is really getting in the way of my ability to save money.

35 shares on Twitch this month:

Having leftover pizza for breakfast is an actual blessing.

69 shares on Reddit this month:

Sometimes I’m just so exhausted I have to go to bed and scroll my phone for the next 2-3 hours.

80 shares on Facebook this month:

I remember when a computer didn’t automatically connect to the internet, it used to make a screaming noise. We should have listened.

56 shares on WeChat this month:

“Are you seeing anyone,” like hallucinating?

20 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Hot person: wow, everyone here is so nice.

41 shares on Discord this month:

Need a professional way to say, “I do not care, don’t mention this to me again.”

87 shares on YouTube this month:

Never mind a Roomba, I need a robot garbage can that will follow my kids around the house all day.

94 shares on Threads this month:

I love when I can smell my perfume on myself, like damn girl, you smell delicious.

47 shares on Snapchat this month:

Sorry, babe, can’t right now. The group chat is active, and I’m trying to get my joke in before they change topics.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

I don’t hate anyone in particular, I just hate everyone in general.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

Everything I like is either expensive, illegal, or wont text me back.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

I pretend I don’t care about stuff, but that’s only because I have no idea what’s going on around me at any given time.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

You never realize how long a minute is until you’re exercising.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has viewed:

My hobbies include adding things to my cart, and never buying them.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has downloaded:

Dating these days is like trusting a crackhead to come back with your change.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

The Slow and the Furious: me navigating a shopping cart through a grocery store filled with morons.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

Got a job rejection, saw the company post the same job again, so I applied again. I decide when we’re done.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

Dropped my skinny boyfriend between the bed and the wall like a vape or a TV remote.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

If you would just let me help, you’d be in an even worse position than you are now.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Instagram:

She asked to see where the magic happens, so I showed her my sandwich maker.

Making waves on Instagram:

“Nobody wants to work anymore!” Personally, I have never wanted to work.

Going bananas on Twitch:

I used to be so graceful, now I am like a puppy with a box stuck on her head.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Grateful for independence mostly because British food is gross.

Seen just now on X:

Them: Money doesn’t bring happiness. Me: Pass the money over here, I like to be sad.

Going viral on Instagram:

Eating the rest of the donuts will keep me from eating donuts tomorrow. My logic is flawless.

Trending via Instagram:

With no training whatsoever, I took out myself and the other two people exiting the ski lift in one fell swoop.

Going bananas on Twitch:

My dad’s handwriting makes a pharmacist look like a calligrapher.

Trending via Threads:

Slipping into something a little more comfortable (psychosis).

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

I read classics because my FOMO is making me want to understand every reference ever.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

If you’re just talking nonsense all the time and not thinking about what you’re doing, you’re either in love or at the office.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

The feminine urge to be the most feared witch in the village.

Follow your heart, but take your brain with you.

When I was a kid, I thought cicadas were the sound sunshine makes when it’s real hot outside.

Sex in the snow is wintercourse.

I think nervous flatulence would be helpful if you were ever kidnapped.

He’s an everything bagel… I’m just a nothing burger…

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨