Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

I would like to see the USA go metric before I die, just so I can enjoy the outrage that would follow.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

“You’re an athlete,” I whisper to myself, as I begin my third attempt to get out of the couch.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

I wish there was a nicer way to say “my natural tendency to spot patterns is making me feel very uncomfortable about you”.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

I take issue with furniture that deliberately moves 1 inch when you’re in a rush to get by.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

Turns out that ending meetings with “have the day you deserve” has made me some enemies at work.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

Me, literally climbing out of a dumpster: Can I give you some personal advice?

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

When things get hot, they expand, so I’m just getting warmer, not gaining weight.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

It’s been so long since I had sex last, went jogging in flip flops just to remember the sound.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

You wear a white shirt and all of a sudden everybody wants to go eat spaghetti.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

I’m a Leo so I just eat the other astrological signs.