I’m sorry I roasted you, I was trying to flirt.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

According to this box of macaroni and cheese, I am an entire family.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

I was sad, but then I ordered some new clothes. I’m okay now.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

I’m not super into getting older but I do like how nobody asks me to help them move anymore.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

If you’re in first class on a flight, sometimes they upgrade you to captain.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

“Are you dating anyone?” I close my eyes when I walk past mirrors.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

If you voted for someone because “he’s not a politician”, then I hope your next colonoscopy is done by a plumber.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

Parenting is yelling ‘you just had a snack!’ over and over until you give in and throw them another snack.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

Date idea: We watch Breaking Bad and break your bed.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

Playing dumb for five minutes often saves a lot of work.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

I love saying “why would I lie” when I’m lying.