Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

I would prefer not to.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

Hey, I noticed you’re not saying what I want.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

People who grew up with money will look you in the eyes and ask you something insane like, “Do you ski?”

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

I try not to laugh at my own jokes, but we all know I’m hilarious.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

You can’t keep running away from your problems, you’re getting older and your kids are getting faster.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

Welcome to your 40’s: you’re not hungover, it’s just Tuesday.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

They say there’s no such thing as a stupid question, but then they’ll go and wake you up to ask if you’re asleep.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

I make sure to post my political opinions after my selfies have gone viral to cull the herd.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

I never argue, I just explain why I’m right.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

“Are you ok?” Of course not. Next question!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,635

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on LinkedIn:

The real body count is how many people are in therapy because of you.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

I told my daughter to check her attitude, and she responded, “For complaints about attitude, please contact the manufacturer.”

Going viral on Discord:

I wish I was a kid again so everyone would be proud of me for taking a long nap.

Seen just now on Discord:

At first, big breasts were attractive, then suddenly it was big butts. I’m waiting for it to finally be big bellies.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Parenting a teenager is surreal because you’ll be sitting there, and some dude who is much taller than you will walk around the corner and ask you how to open a popcorn bag.

Going bananas on Instagram:

I’ve skipped midlife crisis and gone straight to birdwatching.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

They’re making me do work at work.

Breaking via WeChat:

Ain’t no way there’s billions of us and nobody got superpowers.

Trending via Messenger:

If you want to experience hunger, go and live with a wealthy person or family.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Asking doctors about nutrition is like asking software engineers about printers, they really have no idea.

Labubu?! Sounds like a name picked mid-sneeze!

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Labubu?! Bless you! Who knew sneezes came with naming rights! 🤧😂

humor, name, picked, sneeze, sounds, wordplay

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I disagree with everyone and think relationships should be easy.

0

5 months ago

communication, disagree, disagreement, easy, everyone, humor, i, relationship, relationships, sarcasm, should, think
The note on this boxed wine says ‘Fresh up to 6 weeks after opening’. 6 weeks. Lol.

0

2 months ago

boxed, boxed wine, fresh, humor, laugh, lol, note, weeks, wine
How does spaghetti know that I’m wearing light-colored clothes?

0

2 months ago

clothes, clothing, food, funny observation, humor, irony, know, light-colored, light-colored clothes, observation, spaghetti, stains
The way people who are really into each other look moments before kissing is so hot. It’s like seeing a glimpse of cannibalism.

0

2 months ago

attraction, before, cannibalism, funny observation, glimpse, hot, humor, intimacy, kiss, kissing, love, moment, moments, observation, people, romance, seeing
I wonder if it’s possible to swim from one end to the other in a pool filled with mashed potatoes.

0

2 months ago

absurdity, activity, end, food, fun, fun activity, humor, i, imagination, mashed, mashed potato, pool, potato, swim, wonder
In my experience, bowling and pancakes have the same energy. High hopes at the beginning, lowered self-esteem at the end.

0

2 months ago

activity, bowling, comparison, end, energy, expectations, experience, fun, fun activity, high, high hopes, hopes, humor, lowered, lowered self-esteem, pancakes, self-esteem

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

88 shares on Facebook this month:

I hate when people are outside when I’m trying to parallel park. I need some privacy.

15 shares on Twitch this month:

Bringing a fitted sheet to a knife fight.

47 shares on Telegram this month:

Sorry to interrupt your scrolling, but I hope life gets better for you.

11 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Blocking me is like blocking the sun, the moon and the stars.

26 shares on Reddit this month:

The real reason for global warming is that today’s young people are nowhere near as cool as we were back then.

40 shares on Threads this month:

I will never sell out my integrity unless I am offered something for it.

35 shares on TikTok this month:

I won’t bore you with my problems because all of my problems are fascinating.

58 shares on X this month:

I would love to have children one day. Two days maximum.

21 shares on YouTube this month:

I march to the beat of my own dumb.

84 shares on YouTube this month:

Did you know 17 muscles are activated when you’re crying? Fitness is my passion.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Changing my passwords regularly has certainly helped protect my accounts. Against me.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

All the observable evidence suggests that, if I was much worse at my job, I’d be more likely to get a promotion to senior management.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

TVs are like, literally, the only thing that has gotten cheaper as I’ve gotten older.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

I could never work in an aquarium. I would have a penguin under my shirt at the end of the shift.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

Santa keeps a pair of mounted antlers over his fireplace to keep the reindeer from unionizing.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

Not being able to fall asleep is so embarrassing. All I’m asking my brain to do is nothing and it can’t even do that?

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

WhatsApp calls should indicate whose internet is poor to avoid unnecessary arguments.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

Welcome to your 40s. You’re home from the party before you used to go out for the party in your 20s.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

If the shampoo and the conditioner finish at the same time, one of them faked it.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

I tried selling my soul to the devil, and he said no.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Discord:

Yogurts should come in a five-pack, not a four-pack, or make the workweek four days.

Live now on Pinterest:

Everyone is fighting a battle you don’t know about, except for me. I am complaining loudly about my battle. Everybody knows about it.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Hey beauty brands who make face creams: 30ml is only enough for an ant’s face.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Real lovers are currently single, by the way.

Just shared via X:

If buying isn’t owning, then pirating isn’t stealing.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Please respond to my telepathic messages.

Broadcasted on X:

At the first signs of a sore throat, you should be given the option of just skipping four days into the future.

Trending via Messenger:

There’s someone in our team who behaves horribly to me and whenever I have to type his name, I’ve taken to using a slightly smaller font size than for everyone else’s.

Spotted on Snapchat:

My sleeping cycle is completely backwards. In the morning I feel sleepy and at night I can’t fall asleep.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

“Please feel free to ignore this email!” Way ahead of you, buddy.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Labubu?! Sounds like a name picked mid-sneeze!

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I disagree with everyone and think relationships should be easy.

The note on this boxed wine says ‘Fresh up to 6 weeks after opening’. 6 weeks. Lol.

How does spaghetti know that I’m wearing light-colored clothes?

The way people who are really into each other look moments before kissing is so hot. It’s like seeing a glimpse of cannibalism.

I wonder if it’s possible to swim from one end to the other in a pool filled with mashed potatoes.

In my experience, bowling and pancakes have the same energy. High hopes at the beginning, lowered self-esteem at the end.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨