Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

You get your hands on a real serious pair of scissors and wonder what the hell they were doing with the regular ones.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

Asking people their favorite color and then calling them liars.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

Most meetings end with the conclusion that everything needs to be discussed in another meeting.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

They should invent a rom-com where no one has to overhear anything that leads to a huge unnecessary misunderstanding.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

The longer I work in corporate, the more I realize… Micromanaging is just insecurity dressed up as leadership.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

Waffles are just pancakes with abs.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

I’m officially at the age where I enjoy when people cancel plans.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

I hate checking my bank account after having a good time.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has viewed:

The most avoidant man you know is somewhere telling someone he’s a lover boy.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

They say the best things take time. That’s why I’m always late.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,429

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Messenger:

My guardian angel is probably preoccupied with sports betting apps and generative AI, that’s why she’s letting all these bad things happen to me.

Trending via TikTok:

Yoga is just slow motion breakdancing.

Breaking via Messenger:

Sorry to any bands who see me yawn during their show. It’s not you, it’s just past 10pm.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Reading is a gateway drug to being less stupid.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Maturity is when you realize money can actually buy happiness.

Just landed via Threads:

The best part about being married is having a permanent person to debrief with immediately after any social event.

Just landed via X:

The fine art of sticking my nose where it doesn’t belong.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I aspire to be a stay-at-home mom with no kids.

Breaking via Telegram:

Got possessed by a demon once, and everyone was like, “OMG, did you do something with your hair?”

Trending via TikTok:

If I were a billionaire, I wouldn’t build rockets to escape to Mars. I would build rockets to make everyone else leave Earth.

Less talkie. More kissie.

3 days ago

Funny Quotes

Playful text emphasizing silence and affection with a humorous tone.

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Commentary:
When words fail, lips prevail! 💋😂

communication, flirtation, humor, kiss, less, relationship, romance

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Social Media Stars ⭐

65 shares on Telegram this month:

Not opening up anymore, have fun trying to figure me out.

57 shares on WeChat this month:

Apparently, when you treat someone the same way they treat you, they get offended!

67 shares on X this month:

All I’m saying is that at first I am shy and then I become a podcast.

32 shares on TikTok this month:

Sometimes I just want someone to hug me and say “I know it’s hard, but you’ll be okay. Here’s a coffee and a million dollars.”

37 shares on Facebook this month:

I feel like this holiday season, it’s important to remind people of the true meaning of Christmas: ghosts terrorizing rich people in the middle of the night until they agree to pay their employees more.

38 shares on Discord this month:

Nosferatu implies the existence of a Yesferatu.

13 shares on Discord this month:

Sometimes I’m just so exhausted I have to go to bed and scroll my phone for the next 2-3 hours.

90 shares on Threads this month:

According to my calculations, we’re all screwed.

82 shares on WhatsApp this month:

“I have an AI boyfriend.” No, you don’t. It’s Adam and Eve or Adam and Steve, not Adam and USB.

90 shares on X this month:

Who needs therapy when you can just cry in a fast-food parking lot.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

Weird. I’m the only one naked at this gender reveal party.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

They should combine the running of the bulls with Tour de France next year.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

Getting ghosted by someone who bothered you in the first place is crazy.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

Life is short, flirt with me!

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

Never vacuuming so I don’t disrupt my carpet’s natural micro biome.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

Being a woman is hard. You always want to buy something, slap someone, lose weight and eat something sweet.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

Helvetica is my favorite font that sounds like a heavy metal band.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

“Clean” my shower? Then what? Give my car a ride into town?

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

To get my cat to eat, I tell him about all the hungry cats in Catfrica.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

Perhaps the best thing about getting older is that I no longer want to know everything.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I am thinking of watching a movie with my boyfriend. Can anyone recommend a good boyfriend?

Making waves on Discord:

Making art is making love to the world.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Major cheat code in life: ask for the big, unreasonable thing. The universe meets you at your level of audacity.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Hansel and Gretel weren’t wrong, every bad decision I’ve ever made started with being hungry.

Trending via Discord:

Kinda in the mood to let my feelings impair my judgement.

Trending via Discord:

I might look like I have my life together, but that’s only because the mess is out of the camera frame.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I’m tired of commercials trying to be funny. Scare me into buying something. I want to be terrified of buying the wrong toothpaste.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I deserve a dragon after all I’ve been through.

Going viral on YouTube:

You’re mistaking me with someone who’s stupid.

Trending via Discord:

Your secrets are safe with me. I wasn’t even listening.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Less talkie. More kissie.

You learn a lot about someone when you marry them. For example, I learned I should have married someone else.

It’s the weekend, so naturally, I’m going to spend 48 hours doing nothing, and still be exhausted.

Girl, you gotta try this healing potion. It’s called beer.

I can handle most things in life, but hearing people chew isn’t one of them.

I’ve just filed a restraining order against reality.

I see people my age out there climbing mountains and skydiving, and here I am feeling good about myself because I got my leg through my underwear without losing my balance.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Less talkie. More kissie.

Keep the laugh going 😂

You learn a lot about someone when you marry them. For example, I learned I should have married someone else.

It’s the weekend, so naturally, I’m going to spend 48 hours doing nothing, and still be exhausted.

Girl, you gotta try this healing potion. It’s called beer.

I can handle most things in life, but hearing people chew isn’t one of them.

I’ve just filed a restraining order against reality.

I see people my age out there climbing mountains and skydiving, and here I am feeling good about myself because I got my leg through my underwear without losing my balance.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨