Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • If a woman says “Do what you want!”, then for God’s sake don’t do what you want!
  • Maybe one day a street will be named after me. Or a school. Or a mental hospital.
  • Roses are red. Let’s get some fresh air. Make love in the moonlight. Have a pregnancy scare.
  • The man who invented autocorrect has died. Restaurant in peace.
  • When I was little, I didn’t care what I wore. I just went along with what my parents chose. When I look in old photo albums, l realize that they didn’t care either.
  • Dear nurses, you don’t have to announce my weight, just write it down. That’s why I have my eyes closed when I’m on the scale.