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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

Spent the day decorating the house for Christmas and my wife spent the day re-decorating the house for Christmas.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

“I hate small talk!” Oh okay. Do you think all your grandparents are going to heaven?

Someone from 🇮🇹 has downloaded:

Just when you’ve built some confidence that you’re a smarter than average human, universe sends you captcha.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

I remember sex. That was cool.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

I’ve walked the walk, but nowadays I just sit the sit.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has shared:

I know so many people with cats, and only a tiny number of them went to a shelter and picked out a cat. Everyone else I know with a cat has a story that’s like, ‘Yeah, he just moved in.’

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

Awesome that January is over, but rude that our reward for getting through it is February.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

Let’s draft everyone who has their phone on military time first, since you’re all so eager.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

Candy companies will look you straight in the eye and lie about how they know what a banana tastes like.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

I was walking near a construction site today and heard the foreman yell, “You’re doing a good job!” I know that was meant for me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Jan 20, 2026

3,556

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

Posing for photos has to be the most basic thing I’m actually terrible at.

Just landed via Threads:

I can’t wait til I have hearing aids, so I can just turn them off when I’m tired of hearing everyone.

Just shared via Discord:

Our parents were right all along, the music is too loud.

Trending via Snapchat:

In these difficult times, it’s important to remember that cheese exists.

Just landed via Slack:

ChatGPT is down right now and if you listen closely, you can hear millions of content creators screaming.

Spotted on Reddit:

My friend says to me, “What rhymes with orange?” And I told him, “No, it doesn’t.”

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Grok, is this true? Grok, am I original? Grok, am I the only one? Grok, am I sexual?

Trending via Facebook:

A girl can casually just say something, and you already know you’re not going to date or marry her.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

Got electrocuted while fixing the doorbell, and now I can hear my girlfriend’s thoughts. She’s thinking she should have called an electrician.

Trending via Snapchat:

I’ve never seen a McDonald’s or a Burger King under construction. They just show up.

Monday: The only day when you can wear the same outfit from the day before without anyone noticing.

3 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, Monday, the magical day where our outfits get a second chance to shine without judgement! 🌟 Who needs a fresh wardrobe when you have Monday's forgiving nature? 😜 Embrace the repeat outfit and conquer the day with confidence! 💼🎉"

before, day, fashion, humor, laziness, Monday, outfit, same, unnoticed, wear, workweek

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

56 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Ain’t no way there’s billions of us and nobody got superpowers.

53 shares on TikTok this month:

Perfume and jewelry are two things you can never go wrong with gifting me.

45 shares on YouTube this month:

Being called by your real name in a relationship kinda sounds like a divorce.

100 shares on Snapchat this month:

The dead bodies on Mt. Everest remind me that it’s perfectly fine to stay home and be lazy.

33 shares on Reddit this month:

Your future doctor is using ChatGPT to pass med school so you better start eating healthy.

39 shares on Twitch this month:

That moment when you finish watching a TV series and you don’t know what to do with your life any more.

71 shares on Slack this month:

Let’s drink some whiskey and say too much.

79 shares on TikTok this month:

Some people don’t have a permanent handwriting. It depends on their mood and the pen they use.

49 shares on Pinterest this month:

Just gonna drink light beers today, because I don’t wanna get drunk but I do enjoy peeing 30 times.

63 shares on Twitch this month:

Can’t sleep because I keep finding exciting opportunities to get pissed off.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

15 folks are currently checking 👀

You can’t have a bad day at work if you don’t go.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I would pay extra for a dental hygienist who was comfortable with silence.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

You can be anything. Be the person who ends the meeting early.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

At the gym and I forgot my headphones and now I have to listen to my own thoughts. Send help.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Had salad for the third night in a row and now I get why you’re so angry, vegans.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Suffering from a forehead kisses deficiency (self-diagnosed).

15 folks are currently checking 👀

As someone with OCD, I can’t help but respect how Pringles are just like, no, this is the order you must eat them in.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not drunk enough for this Teams meeting.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Kinda miss when crushes were butterflies instead of complex emotional calculations about compatibility and red flags.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Fake laughing with customers is actually a job skill.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,339

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

Follow your heart, but take your brain with you.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

Establish dominance at work by telling your coworkers they look tired before they get a chance to say it to you.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

Fuzzy socks on and ready for anything.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

Isn’t your email address beautifulgirl@mydreams.com?

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

Just know that somebody out there is thinking of you, and you should really lock your doors.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

Adult friendships are difficult. The people I get on best with never want to leave the house either.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

You don’t scare me. You’re not a parking garage that I can’t figure out how to get out of.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

I’m so loyal to my music, I’ll hunt down a song I used to love five years back.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

I’m going to a karaoke bar tomorrow, where I’ll sing every song in the style of Yoko Ono.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

By the time he entered rehab, Popeye was more spinach than sailor man.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Reddit:

I deserve an Oscar for telling my dentist I don’t eat candy.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I just want to find someone that gets annoyed by the same things as I do.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Folks, please have more respect for people with glasses. Because they pay money to see you.

Trending via YouTube:

Just did my own taxes, I should be in jail by Friday.

Making waves on Facebook:

The good news: once you get a PhD, friends and family will refer to you as doctor. The bad news: They will only do it when you’re wrong.

Spotted on WeChat:

I’ve never been to hell, but I once forgot to buy batteries for the toys on Christmas morning. The sound is still ringing in my ears.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I think some of you are faking your sarcasms.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Nowadays, people no longer look for a needle in a haystack, but for errors in a spreadsheet.

Going viral on Snapchat:

“I’m gonna decide everyone’s pronouns and sexuality tonight. And, yes, there will be some big surprises.”

Seen just now on Facebook:

Imagine if all the money spent on AI was spent on trains.

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