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Commentary:
"Sounds like you're getting ahead in more ways than one! 💥 Keep pushing through those rocky situations – soon your head will be as tough as a diamond! 💎 Remember, it's all about perspective… and maybe investing in a helmet. 🪖😄"

bottom, dented, head, humor, resilience, rock, self-deprecation, struggle

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

They probably killed the first few people whose eyes turned red in a photograph before they realized it wasn’t any demon stuff.

1 month ago
before, demon, eyes, humor, joke, killed, misunderstanding, paranormal, people, photograph, photography, red, stuff, supernatural, superstition, turned
A DM? Flirt on the timeline like a real man.

1 month ago
confidence, conversation, dating, DM, flirt, humor, man, media, real, social, social media, timeline
I could easily win an Oscar, I just have other things going on right now.

1 month ago
acting, award, busy, easily, going, humor, i, just, Oscar, priorities, right, self-deprecation, things, win
Lord of the Rings is a story about a brave little Hobbit on a mission to destroy a ring and save the world, and his annoying friend Frodo.

1 month ago
adventure, annoying, brave, bravery, destroy, fantasy, friend, Frodo, Hobbit, humor, little, lord, mission, ring, rings, save, save world, story, world
Waiting in the grocery store parking lot for the rotisserie chickens to be ready. The thrill of the hunt.

2 months ago
chicken, food, food humor, grocery, grocery store, humor, hunt, lot, parking, parking lot, ready, rotisserie, rotisserie chicken, shopping, shopping humor, store, thrill, waiting
You get to choose which path you take. I see some of you have chosen the psychopath.

1 month ago
choice, choose, decision, humor, i, life, life choice, path, psychopath, take

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

Going to therapy is like having someone walk around your brain and going “ohhhh, this is how you’re living?!”

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

Shoutout to the friends that still like me. All two of you.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

Phew, I thought the weather was broken because there was this weird yellow thing in the sky. But all’s well, it’s raining again.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Girls don’t actually shop. We just walk round touching the clothes saying ‘this is cute’.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

Adding “Free HBO” to your dating profile isn’t the game changer you’d think it’d be.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

I did vote once but only because I thought the line was to a buffet.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

If you voted for someone because “he’s not a politician”, then I hope your next colonoscopy is done by a plumber.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Shoutout to all ladies dating silently without making noise on social media. May God give you another man as a bonus.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

One man’s worst nightmare (me) is another man’s peace (also me).

Seen just now on Telegram:

Career? Never heard of her. I’m majoring in sunshine and snacks.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

He probably follows so many women because he believes in elevating their voices.

Live now on WeChat:

I like how “energy bars” are really just candy bars, and we all pretend to not notice.

Just shared via TikTok:

Maybe if I spend another day alone in my room then something life-changing will suddenly happen to me!?

Just shared via X:

Crazy to think that even after all of these years the Titanic’s pool still has water in it.

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Activity Log ✨

My head is starting to get dented from hitting rock bottom so often.

They probably killed the first few people whose eyes turned red in a photograph before they realized it wasn’t any demon stuff.

I could easily win an Oscar, I just have other things going on right now.

Lord of the Rings is a story about a brave little Hobbit on a mission to destroy a ring and save the world, and his annoying friend Frodo.

Waiting in the grocery store parking lot for the rotisserie chickens to be ready. The thrill of the hunt.

You get to choose which path you take. I see some of you have chosen the psychopath.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

How many cups of coffee is OK to have every day? Is it eight? I’m pretty sure it’s eight.

Can I do better? Yes. Will I do better? Probably not.

Sometimes I delay my haircut intentionally to look rugged just to make that glow-up more iconic.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I’m at an age where I don’t have to go anywhere and I still have jet lag.

Things went well until the evil supermarket people hid my favorite products in new places.

August is almost over. September is next week. Time to pick out a Halloween costume and start your Christmas shopping. Happy New Year, everybody.

Unfortunately, it only strengthens my spirit when the summer people mourn their terrible season.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Show dominance by ending the year in bed.

For someone who loves to sleep so much, you’d think I’d go to bed earlier.

Marriage tip: If your wife goes silent in the middle of an argument, you probably shouldn’t ask if you can go back to mowing the lawn.

Some people don’t have a permanent handwriting. It depends on their mood and the pen they use.

So many spreadsheets and not once did I feel excelled.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

So I used to wonder about people that paid a fortune for those little bottles of Evian water, until I read it backwards.

I identify as a weather forecast: Anything’s possible.

I could put my keys in the same spot every day, but why deprive myself of a treasure hunt that makes me late.

Remember when we had to smack the TV because the channel wasn’t coming in clearly? I feel that way about far too many people.

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My head is starting to get dented from hitting rock bottom so often.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

They probably killed the first few people whose eyes turned red in a photograph before they realized it wasn’t any demon stuff.

A DM? Flirt on the timeline like a real man.

I could easily win an Oscar, I just have other things going on right now.

Lord of the Rings is a story about a brave little Hobbit on a mission to destroy a ring and save the world, and his annoying friend Frodo.

Waiting in the grocery store parking lot for the rotisserie chickens to be ready. The thrill of the hunt.

You get to choose which path you take. I see some of you have chosen the psychopath.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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