Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

Grok, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

Depression is embarrassing because sometimes it makes you miss appointments and not return phone calls, and when the fog starts to lift, you gotta do a whole bloody apology tour.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

Warning: This movie contains “Adult Themes” such as interest rates, bad knees, back pain, and excitement about going to bed early.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

The trick is to be born in the right place and at the right time. If you mess that up, it gets tedious.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

Internet strangers offer the best advice.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

Playing Mortal Kombat at an arcade in the 90’s would fix me.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

Just remembered I can just get drunk after work instead of quitting. That was a close one.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

Women love asking you questions about the movie you both are watching.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

A poorly timed two-factor authentication request will be the thing that finally kills me.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

I’m going to start reading books again, as soon as I finish the internet.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,745

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I just want a bar where I can pour my own drink, have music at a normal volume, and there are no people, and it’s my house.

Making waves on Telegram:

Practicing how I’m gonna explain to the aliens that baseline and Vaseline do not sound the same.

Just landed via Reddit:

I don’t post for money or fame, I post because there’s something seriously wrong with me.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Asking my dentist a question, but sticking my fingers in his mouth before he replies.

Trending via Instagram:

Milk or be milked.

Seen just now on WeChat:

If a billionaire is telling you to vote for someone, it’s probably in your best interest to vote for the other person.

Making waves on Slack:

I’m in a long-distance relationship with the stars.

Seen just now on Facebook:

No need for a Halloween costume this year because there’s nothing scarier than being in your mid-20s and not knowing who you are or what you want to do anymore.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Opinions are like air fryers. Everyone’s got one and they won’t stop banging on about them.

Spotted on WeChat:

Dear sleep: thanks for trying, but you can’t beat surfing the net.

Nighty night! Don’t let the horror of existence bite.

Funny, playful text about bedtime with a dark humor twist.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Off to dreamland we go, hoping that existential dread doesn't show! 🌙💤 Don't let the monsters in your mind keep you up tonight. Sweet nightmares!"

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

51 shares on Slack this month:

If you wake up early enough, you can go back to sleep for a few hours. Not everyone knows this.

69 shares on WeChat this month:

I get ignored so much, my name should be “terms and conditions”.

81 shares on WeChat this month:

One day my sanity went out for smokes and never came back.

43 shares on Discord this month:

I didn’t ghost you, I saved you from me.

17 shares on Discord this month:

Explain it to me like I’m five then do it for me like I’m one hundred.

92 shares on TikTok this month:

Even though he murders a lot of people, you can tell Freddie Kruger is a fun loving guy cause he goes by Freddie and not Fred or Frederick.

78 shares on Snapchat this month:

Offering people sitting on the bus my standing room. Like it’s better.

44 shares on Slack this month:

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

66 shares on Threads this month:

Girls who leave clothing reviews with their height, weight, and size ordered are going to heaven.

22 shares on Pinterest this month:

Old people like to golf every day because they are so sick of everyone’s shit and just wanna repeatedly whack something.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m buysexual, you buy me food, I become sexual.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t really like the song “I’ve Got a Feeling” by Black Eyed Peas, but I just like the part where they say “Mazel Tov.”

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I feel like this holiday season, it’s important to remind people of the true meaning of Christmas: ghosts terrorizing rich people in the middle of the night until they agree to pay their employees more.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

It is a shame that nothing is built in America anymore. I just bought a TV that said: “Built in Antenna”. I don’t even know where that is.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Trust my gut? The thing that can’t even handle milk.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Maybe the clouds, trees, and flowers love looking at you too.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Dear people who talk on speakerphone out in public. Everyone around you hates you.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I followed a diet but it didn’t follow me back, so I unfollowed it.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Rock bottom ain’t even that bad of a place to be if you’re into collecting rocks.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Only people who grew up before the internet will remember these: spelling, grammar and punctuation.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,675

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

Welcome to your 40s, you now don’t understand a single word anyone under 25 is saying.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

Tornados are just a bunch of ghosts fighting over a cow.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

I don’t need to learn something new, I need to remember something old, like why did I come into this room?

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

Be the horrifying lore of your family’s lineage.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

I accidentally bought a pair of nose-cancelling headphones and now my glasses keep falling off.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

…and so ends another week of me not becoming unexpectedly rich.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

The worst thing you can do while cleaning is sit down for a minute.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

Relationship rule: If the woman has told something and the man doesn’t remember, the man hasn’t listened. If the man has told something and the woman doesn’t remember, the man has never told it.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

The older I get, the more I walk like Charlie Chaplin.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Slack:

Oh, to live in simpler times, when there was nothing to do but sit by the seashore and contemplate the miracle of existence.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I do not like how Netflix threatens to start the movie while I’m just tryna read the description. Like, please, you’re making me anxious.

Spotted on Instagram:

I get you, bowel syndrome. I’m irritable, too.

Trending via TikTok:

Jingle all the way? In this economy?

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

The real pandemic was when everyone was reading The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck.

Live now on Threads:

The fact it costs $15 to get a basic meal at a fast-food restaurant now is comical.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here hating myself more.

Spotted on Discord:

I’m upset that my parents never got rich enough for me to become a socialist.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Japan’s greatest tragedy is having the world’s best toilets and no Mexican food. What’s the point of owning a Ferrari if you never take it to the track?

Going viral on Messenger:

The local casino is hosting a speed dating event. Just what every woman needs, a new boyfriend with a gambling problem.

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