Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

I just found out it takes 5 sheep to make one wool sweater. I didn’t even know they knew how to knit.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

Is my life this bad because I didn’t forward that email to 15 people back in 2007?

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

My so-called “friends” have asked that I stop referring to them that way.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

If this meeting were any slower, it’d be a landscape painting.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

Imagine hating on me and I’m just in my room also hating on me.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

I’m running out of people I like.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

I’d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and I don’t want to see you every day.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

For security reasons, I highly recommend that you leave one of your children home during the holidays to set elaborate booby traps in case of intruders.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

How does world hunger exist when we can fry air?

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

Billionaires didn’t get rich by working harder. They got rich by making sure you work harder, get paid less, and spend more.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

236 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,505

Funny Quotes Topics

17,570

Funny Quotes Images

15,505

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,478

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on TikTok:

I calculated my December budget and realized everyone is getting a hug for Christmas.

Just landed via Facebook:

Trust my gut? The thing that tricks me into buying gas station sushi and roller dogs? No thanks.

Making waves on Snapchat:

If at first you don’t succeed, try two more times so your failure is statistically significant.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Living la vida taco!

Trending via Discord:

I’ve decided to cut my carbs… into smaller pieces before eating them.

Breaking via YouTube:

The prime minister is a minister that is not divisible by any other minister.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

If God did not intend for us to eat animals, then why did he make them out of meat?

Going viral on Pinterest:

Silence is golden. But duct tape is silver.

Seen just now on TikTok:

The T in depression stands for the therapy places that are immediately available.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Funny that all this nonsense just stayed in people’s heads before Twitter came along.

Not being able to see Likes on posts is a tragedy. Love it when two people are arguing and you can see all their little backup dancers.

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Not being able to see Likes on posts is a tragedy. Love it when two people are arguing and you can see all their little backup dancers.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the invisible Like button strikes again! It's like watching a showdown with a troop of tiny supporters doing the wave in the background 🕺🙌💃. Who needs popcorn when you have backup dancers keeping the drama alive! 🎭🌟 #SocialMediaEntertainment"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

43 shares on WhatsApp this month:

“You win some. You lose some.” Me, after losing for the millionth time in a row.

14 shares on Snapchat this month:

My signature move is forgetting someone’s name 2 seconds after they tell me.

56 shares on Slack this month:

Girls really only want one simple thing; and that one thing is all of your attention.

95 shares on Facebook this month:

I wish that reading books in the park were my job, and I got paid six figures for it.

73 shares on Telegram this month:

If you want to make your mother proud, make her my mother-in-law.

87 shares on Discord this month:

Depression is embarrassing because sometimes it makes you miss appointments and not return phone calls, and when the fog starts to lift, you gotta do a whole bloody apology tour.

75 shares on Snapchat this month:

Humans are just chaos wrapped in meat, going bananas on caffeine.

10 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m so smart, I got rid of cable and now I only have $638 in monthly streaming services.

86 shares on Messenger this month:

People who own banana costumes will wear that shit to anything.

19 shares on X this month:

When something Asian becomes popular enough, it becomes Mexican.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m accused of being a plagiarist. Their words, not mine.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

So it turns out that being an adult is mostly just Googling how to do stuff.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

All income is disposable if you’re brave enough.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

This gum has my stomach convinced food is coming.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

What must a pancake think when it’s being flipped? Doubtless something jolly.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Checking Twitter now is like staring into your refrigerator to see if anything good has magically appeared.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Ever looked at your ex and wondered, was I drunk the entire relationship?

6 folks are currently checking 👀

According to my chocolate advent calendar, tomorrow is Christmas.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Social media can teach you a lot of lessons. Grammar is not one of them.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I had the most impatient and rudest cashier. I’m never using self-checkout again.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

236 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,505

Funny Quotes Topics

17,570

Funny Quotes Images

15,505

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,642

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Dude, we’re biting off more than we can chew tonight if you want to pull up.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

Please don’t match my crazy. One of us has to be rational here, and it’s definitely not going to be me.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

Glad to be born at a time when I got to see what life was like before the internet, and will be dead before AI completely destroys humanity.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

Kids today will never understand how many ninjas there were in the 1980s.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

How bad can a decision really be if nobody from the future shows up to stop you?

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

I love how a film can be life-changing for one person and boring for another.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

According to autocorrect, my favorite Star Wars character is Bob’s Feet.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

I hope this email blows your head smoove off.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

There are real people living amongst us who pay for Discord Nitro.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

Even worse than a spider is a spider that just disappeared.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WeChat:

There are people on TV who are not ruined by fame, but who ruin fame.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Imagine you go bowling by yourself and you go sit down, but it’s your turn again.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Life is hard. It is harder if you are stupid.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Death cannot harm me more than you have harmed me, my beloved life.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Driving between speed cameras is called intermittent fasting.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Sorry I’m late. It’s just because of who I am as a person.

Spotted on Telegram:

Me passing someone: you slow mule! Me being passed: okay, speed racer!

Just landed via Reddit:

Never make a promise you can’t keep rescheduling.

Trending via Messenger:

Look, the problem with The Life of a Showgirl is that, for maybe the first time in her music career, Taylor Swift has nothing to say.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Hey man, your fly is down. Let me get that for you.

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